How to tell you are a teenager.... well, for starters if you can't tell what age you are then you are suffering from amnesia or very very stupid (you dumbfu-) you are also most likely a teenager (or a creepy middle aged man) if you saw the word "SEX!" before you saw anything else in the title and instantly thought "YES! YES I SHALL CLICK ON THIS AND.... read... this... blog... what? awww..."
OK. Being a teenager involves not getting up in the mornings because you enjoy the night so much. If you are currently nocturnal you might just be a teenager, or a creature of the night. Sometimes the two are indistinguishable and both should be avoided if you are over 35. We are youths, don't mess with us... Even though most of us aren't drunk or stoned at night part of being a teenager is enjoying the fact that old people seem to think this therefore will get out of our way if we talk loud enough.
Being a teenager means someone on TV makes a joke about someone else's poor performance and you instantly realise exactly what that means. You also go "haha! oh burn!" and then realise no one else in the room is laughing... But you don't care that the middle aged people surrounding you don't think the vulgarity of the TV is funny because you know that you're the one who is right. Old people generally don't have good sense of humours.... the exceptions are few but as a teenager if you ever find one you think this is absolutely awesome!
Being a teenager means you know a lot of words your parents don't know. But any satirical things on TV that use this slang go way over board and eventually they'll end up saying something no one on earth understands........ just thought I'd mention that even though it's pretty minor. Damn noobs clogging my TV with their screwed up slang. They'd be hell devo if I found them and pwned their butts....
Being a teenager involves a lot of very innapropriate things....
..... *sheepish look*...... oh yeah.....
giggity giggity
Aaaannnyyyyhhhoooooooo.... (That didn't take long! "ooh burn!")
Being a teenager means you are between the ages of 13 and 19.... if you didn't know this you are pretty damn stupid. I'm surprised you can even read! What are you reading this for? This is boring stop reading it...
Being a teenager means you need to amount as many issues about everything you do and how you look and act and fit in to the social groups around you as much as you possibly can.... because if you don't have at least one issue you lose. The more problems you have the more unique you are and so you win! Yay! You all lose because I'm a sexually undecided hyponcondriac bulemic paranoid schizophrenic perfectionist pyromaniac with an inferiority complex and I don't like being touched and have the fear of purple! YOU LOSE! I WIN! I am now the victor for I have no friends because I yell 4-digit prime numbers at anyone who comes near! (3457! 1423! 7919! 5861! 4007! I can go on like this for a very long time you know!)
Being a teenager means you actually understand the internets... and can has undrstandngs ov lolcat speaks... i.e. we have the ability to destroy the english language with ease!
Being a teenager means you don't fully understand other teenagers when they say that they mainly enjoy helping other people because we all have very different opinions.... and everyone else's is WRONG! The Thing That Should Not Be (TTTSNB)... no you don't enjoy things you do a lot of the time but I rarely ever have to do something I don't like and a very large majority of the time I enjoy myself. You're the selfless one because you don't always enjoy yourself... I'm the selfish one because I do? But then it's still ironic for both... I do a seemingly selfless act for a selfish reason yet you make everyone happy but you yourself aren't always that happy...
Being a teenager means lots of things... if you are not one. Run... run away...
.... faster....
Being a teenager means you have a heightened sense of smell and a thirst for blood...
Sunday, November 30, 2008
Thursday, November 27, 2008
Irony
Hey doesn't anyone think my previous post was kinda ironic because I start off saying I'm far too cruel to the thing that should not be and congratulate him on being a great and significant contributor to this blog then I start mocking him slightly? Yeah... then he has a little laugh at me for my "in joke" and then writes about Star Wars.... the writing about Star Wars isn't ironic although the story of it is (Like Oedipus! Curse you English Lit Drama questions for the exam! They were all boring and sucky!) because Anakin tries his hardest to save someone who he inevitably kills by trying...Irony... b***...
Yes, another ironic thing in life (life is full of iron... and irony... and... tetramethylbutane) is I was up last night very late... I couldn't sleep and I notice on the table is a page from the newspaper taken out and laid out in front of me.... it was about how lack of sleep is bad for teenagers my age specifically... Yeah. I'm trying to get to sleep for two hours wanting to go on the computer (I blame you Brooklyn... I really do, you keep me up at night.... now that sounds really suggestive but if you know me then you know it's not like that at all... it involves lots of thinking and wondering about how things work... anyhoo) and so I'm really not getting any sleep... it's late and I'm suffering from insomnia (which happens in holidays) and the newspaper is telling me all these ways to get to bed... unfortunately the only one of them that doesn't involve doing something a while back (if you must take a nap don't take one after 5pm, adjust your body clock with natural light, exercise about two hours before you go to sleep) was to go to another room for a while... I wanted to go on the computer, that's in another room! (Going on it for an hour makes me tired... because everyone in the world is boring... nah just kidding!) But it also said that new technology like computers and internet and stuff is keeping us awake... what? Everything is designed to keep me awake! Everything!
I want to sleep....
... why does heavy metal music make it easier to sleep? You'd think it'd keep me awake but no...
Another Ironic aspect of my life is I try my best to make everyone happy even if it involves doing something I don't want to... that sounds selfless enough right? Very noble cause in life to make everyone else happy to the end.... But I enjoy it! I do it because it's fun not because I think I have an obligation to always do it... it's fun helping people! Does that make it selfish? If you didn't smile when I helped you then I don't want to help you! BE HAPPY or you're wasting my time! I'm and emotional shell and you must fill me with sweet sweet love! Nah just kidding that... didn't sound right... but yeah... You're right Brooklyn, the world is motivated through selfish actions masquerading as kind ones. But does that make me evil?
I should find a better way to be evil.... hmm... maybe I'll use google earth to spy on people and find their houses? Then send them random letters in the mail :) I once sent someone a dead puppy in the mail... well... you know we were joking about it a few days before so I did it....
The funny thing is... I'm not lying! :D
OK! EXPLANATION! OK before you start thinking I'm honestly insane enough to send a dead puppy in the mail (and think about it, you think I'm going to pay for the shipping costs?) I have to tell you that it was actually just a drawing... a more cartoony drawing than a creepy realistic one. I don't remember what I called it but yeah. I also sent the person a drawing of a gang of undead puppies and the opening bars to my favourite song (that I've written that is... it's called "Goodbye") and 16 pages of unintelligable handwriting that she only partially understood...
What that has to do with Irony I don't know... I just don't like posting really short blogs...
Wednesday, November 26, 2008
revenge of the sith
in-jokes are funny, arent they bilby??? especially ones dealing with certain discreet items i have given to you.
hehehe.
im going to have fun with this.
and it only took me 20 minutes to write about my day, so ner! your a slow typer.
i like to keep my posts relatively short because i realise no-one cares what i think. your still in denial is all. haha.
anyway i have decided that i am sith lord darth metaliccus, and my revenge is in the form of this post.
i have not had THAT much to drink tonight. only about 7 beers, half a bottle of jim beam, 2 vodka cruisers, and 3 iron brew vodka's that my cousin left when she went back home. hooooorrrraaaaayyyyy!
i have had a very trying day. one of my best friends spilt some news onto me that i really wasnt expecting.
i wont say cause i promised i wont. just understand i am very depressed as of now and i will probably carve up my hand tomorow morning at some ungodly hour.
not that there is a god, of course.
and if there is, i know your listening, and im coming for you!!!
i found a book on star wars episode 3: revenge of the sith. it was really fucking awsome! it was really dark compared to the movie, and it went really in depth, and in all honesty it is one of the best books iv read in a while. i really enjoyed it.
yes i know its star wars, and i dont care it was an awsome book. especially the last chapter. that really got to me. it was just so epic! well here it is now.
This is how it feels to be anakin skywalker, forever.
the first dawn of light in your universe brings pain. the light burns you. it will always burn you. part of you will always lie upon black glass sand beside a lake of fire whilst flames chew your flesh.
you can hear yourself breathing. it comes hard, and harsh, and it scrapes every nerve already raw, but you cannot stop it. you can never stop it. you cannot even slow it down.
you dont even have lungs anymore. mechanisms hardwired into your chest breathe for you. they will pump oxygen into you bloodstream forever.
lord vader, can you hear me?
and you cant, not in the way you once did. sensors in the shell that prisons your head trickle meaning directly into your brain.
you open your scorched-pale eyes, optic sensors integrate light and shadow into a hideous simulacrum of the world around you.
or perhaps the simulacrum is perfect, and it is the world that is hideous.
padmé? are you here? are you alright? you try yo say, but anotehr voice speaks for you, out from the vocabulator that serves you for burned away lips ang tongue and throat.
"padmé? are you here? are you alright?"
im very sorry lord vader. im afraid she died. it seems in your anger, you killed her
this burns hotter than the lava did.
"no......no, its not possible"
you love her, you will always love her. you could never will her death.
never.
but you remember....
you remember all of it.
you remember the dragon that you brought vader forth from your heart to slay. you remember the cold venom in vaders blood.
you remember the furnace of vaders fury, and the black hatred of seizing her throat to silence her lying mouth-
and there is one blazing moment in wich you finally understand that there was no dragon. there was no vader. there was only you.
anakin skywalker.
that it was you. all you.
you killed her.
you did it it.
only you.
you killed her.
you killed her because, finally, when you could have saved her, when you could have gona away with her, when you should have been thinking about her, you were thinking about yourself.
it is in this blazing moment that you finally understand the trap of the dark side, the final cruelty of the sith.
because now your self is all you will ever have.
and you rage and you scream and reach through the force to crush the shadow who has destroyed you, but you are so far less now than you were, you are more than half machine, you are like a painter gone blind, a composer gone deaf, you can remember were the power was but the power you can touch is only a memory, and so with all your world destroying fury it is only droids around you that implode, and equipment, and the table on wich you were strapped shatters, and in the end, you cannot touch the shadow.
in the end, you dont even want to.
in the end, the shadow is all you have left.
because the shadow understands you, the shadow forgives you, the shadow gathers you unto itself-
and within you furnace heart, you burn in your own flame.
this is how it feels to be Anakin Skywalker.
Forever...
very deep and i love it. it chills me with the emotion and depth of anakins pain. good god i think im coming...
no but seriously check it out sometime.
anywho, thats all for me, and for the record i hate recieving presents as well.
i agree, shalow and padantic.
hehehe.
im going to have fun with this.
and it only took me 20 minutes to write about my day, so ner! your a slow typer.
i like to keep my posts relatively short because i realise no-one cares what i think. your still in denial is all. haha.
anyway i have decided that i am sith lord darth metaliccus, and my revenge is in the form of this post.
i have not had THAT much to drink tonight. only about 7 beers, half a bottle of jim beam, 2 vodka cruisers, and 3 iron brew vodka's that my cousin left when she went back home. hooooorrrraaaaayyyyy!
i have had a very trying day. one of my best friends spilt some news onto me that i really wasnt expecting.
i wont say cause i promised i wont. just understand i am very depressed as of now and i will probably carve up my hand tomorow morning at some ungodly hour.
not that there is a god, of course.
and if there is, i know your listening, and im coming for you!!!
i found a book on star wars episode 3: revenge of the sith. it was really fucking awsome! it was really dark compared to the movie, and it went really in depth, and in all honesty it is one of the best books iv read in a while. i really enjoyed it.
yes i know its star wars, and i dont care it was an awsome book. especially the last chapter. that really got to me. it was just so epic! well here it is now.
This is how it feels to be anakin skywalker, forever.
the first dawn of light in your universe brings pain. the light burns you. it will always burn you. part of you will always lie upon black glass sand beside a lake of fire whilst flames chew your flesh.
you can hear yourself breathing. it comes hard, and harsh, and it scrapes every nerve already raw, but you cannot stop it. you can never stop it. you cannot even slow it down.
you dont even have lungs anymore. mechanisms hardwired into your chest breathe for you. they will pump oxygen into you bloodstream forever.
lord vader, can you hear me?
and you cant, not in the way you once did. sensors in the shell that prisons your head trickle meaning directly into your brain.
you open your scorched-pale eyes, optic sensors integrate light and shadow into a hideous simulacrum of the world around you.
or perhaps the simulacrum is perfect, and it is the world that is hideous.
padmé? are you here? are you alright? you try yo say, but anotehr voice speaks for you, out from the vocabulator that serves you for burned away lips ang tongue and throat.
"padmé? are you here? are you alright?"
im very sorry lord vader. im afraid she died. it seems in your anger, you killed her
this burns hotter than the lava did.
"no......no, its not possible"
you love her, you will always love her. you could never will her death.
never.
but you remember....
you remember all of it.
you remember the dragon that you brought vader forth from your heart to slay. you remember the cold venom in vaders blood.
you remember the furnace of vaders fury, and the black hatred of seizing her throat to silence her lying mouth-
and there is one blazing moment in wich you finally understand that there was no dragon. there was no vader. there was only you.
anakin skywalker.
that it was you. all you.
you killed her.
you did it it.
only you.
you killed her.
you killed her because, finally, when you could have saved her, when you could have gona away with her, when you should have been thinking about her, you were thinking about yourself.
it is in this blazing moment that you finally understand the trap of the dark side, the final cruelty of the sith.
because now your self is all you will ever have.
and you rage and you scream and reach through the force to crush the shadow who has destroyed you, but you are so far less now than you were, you are more than half machine, you are like a painter gone blind, a composer gone deaf, you can remember were the power was but the power you can touch is only a memory, and so with all your world destroying fury it is only droids around you that implode, and equipment, and the table on wich you were strapped shatters, and in the end, you cannot touch the shadow.
in the end, you dont even want to.
in the end, the shadow is all you have left.
because the shadow understands you, the shadow forgives you, the shadow gathers you unto itself-
and within you furnace heart, you burn in your own flame.
this is how it feels to be Anakin Skywalker.
Forever...
very deep and i love it. it chills me with the emotion and depth of anakins pain. good god i think im coming...
no but seriously check it out sometime.
anywho, thats all for me, and for the record i hate recieving presents as well.
i agree, shalow and padantic.
20 Minutes is not enough
10:45
OK! Just so you know it doesn't take me 20 minutes to write a blog Thing that should not be... 20 minutes isn't nearly enough to do that sort of thing! Apparently you and I disagree about a lot of things that you think only take 20 minutes (Hehehe ooooh he's so going to point out the lack of validity in that...) so I'm just going to time how long I take to blog... and blog I shall! You think you're the only one keeping this thing together? Well... OK you're kinda right but no one blogs as much as you! I posted 10 posts in a month on my other blog (http://www.thewindowofbilby.blogspot.com/ woo! shameless self promotion!) but I am kinda glad that someone (cornflake.... brooklyn.... all those other people I've invited but haven't joined... he's the only one who asked to be in it!) is actually taking this seriously and blogging... so woo! A clap for the thing that should not be... I am far too cruel to you sometimes let's clap some more.... (hehehe big head)
Well food is the secret weakness of all men... not just you. There's another weakness we all share but most girls aren't brave enough to tempt us with that in public... (Why the hell not? COME ON! We don't give a damn about going to buy new shoes with us! Give us an insentive to follow you around! Although it'll probably backfire and we'll just say "uhh... give me a moment I need to... sit down.... cross legged....")
Anyhoo, OK! I don't really write very long blogs on this blog (even though I've mentioned I do write bigs ones every now and then) so someone thinks they actually write long ones... no! wrong... they're not 3 pages long they aren't that big! So let's talk about something shall we?
Picnics! They are very nice things to do... even if they are just in your backyard on plastic chairs overlooking the sea (I was planning on a park but my feet don't like moving....) and all you've got to eat sandwich wise is jam and cheese... not at the same time but the thought of that actually crossed my mind at some time. I decided that it's probably not for the best if I decided to be bold and try jam on cheese.... (cheddar) it might cause the person I was with to lose her appetite. Now you think english/canadian accents are cute (Guys like girls from all countries! Especially countries that have never heard of the terrible terrible things those guys do in their spare time.... you know what I'm talking about thing that should not be! Eyes aren't the only red things... OK that was incredibly suggestive and I didn't actually have anything in specific to imply so let your own dirty mind twist that into whatever you didn't want to think about! THINK ABOUT IT!) well I think that scottish accents are far more appealing... I always have :P Scottish accents (the ones you can understand that is) are made of pure awesome and endless fun listening to some cute girl talk about cute things with a cute accent especially when they think that you are cute... :) woo! OK does this count as personal? I'm talking about picnics with a very special someone (who anyone who reads this blog should actually know.... woo! yeah 6 months and counting!)
IN JOKE TIME!
no... no I haven't used your present....
MAY NO ONE EVER... EVER mention what that in joke was about! EVER! (OK not exactly "joke" but you know... in... inny thingy that you don't need to know about but certain people reading this would want to know... possibly...) I shall hunt you down....
Clocks. Clocks are nice :) I have a clock that's shaped like a TV and it is an adorably cute little present that helps me know what time it is when I am in doubt of the clock right in front of me! (Which I normally have one because my house is filled with them.... and the one on the computer keeps changing so I went to bed at 1am when I thought it was only midnight....) but how do I top a little shiny TV shaped clock? My lovely scottish girl already has a watch! But who knows how long that'll last? (She is like an X-men.... watches stop working after a week due to constant contact with her... she's electric baby! yeeeaaaahhh! Feel the tingling sensation! Mmm-mm! Anyhoo... sorry to have broken your mind children... I just get excited when talking about that :P) basically...
Christmas is a time of fear....
I don't get people presents! I never have... I've never had the chance really. Don't normally see my friends over the long holidays and they never get me anything so I never expect to give anything back... I don't expect presents and I don't even really want them that much... I want one from my parents just as a nice little bonus to the free BBQ sausages I get on that day... that and the present/s make up for the fact I need to see my annoying little cousins who once saw Peter Pan on video when they were very little and decided to take the "never grow up" philosophy very very seriously... they are constantly annoying and act like little children... well... they are little children and have always been that way for as long as I remember but you'd think they'd be slightly older acting little children right? Oh well... I like the one who doesn't talk... she just sits there smiling and not talking... unfortunately she doesn't look creepy when she does it because that would be very cool! But anyhoo, I am very indifferent to getting presents (Yeah... hoorah for Grace! You rock girl!) and basically everytime my girlfriend asks me what I want I go "I want you with a little red ribbon on your head" and she goes "Awwww! That's so cute! But no seriously what do you want?" and I go "A hug" "You get hugs anyway" "and a kiss" "you get that too anyway!" ".... I want extra ones..." and it goes on like that until she figures out that Apocalyptica is currently one of my favourite bands that I am lacking in CD's of so has most likely decided to go out and get me their album Cult or Inquisition symphony... failing that (Which she most likely will because stupid CD stores decide that good music isn't popular enough to be in stores!) she's going to get me Metallica... which she can't fail at because that is popular enough to always have it's own column of CD's stacked tightly together so no one can help but notice it's assorted bands then METALLICA then other random bands... But yeah... I don't mind if no one gets me a gift because I always have such a dificult time coming up with one I really want... they ask me what I want and I go "I have to get back to you... I have to think of something then convince myself I want it just so you can buy it for me for money you could've spent on something else" (Only... not verbatim)
But now... now someone actually expects ME to get them a gift! What? I don't even have a job! And the only place I ever worked at was the place she works at now and she wants to quit because she got paid more serving bread to people! And I worked there for 5/6 hours! Yeah... I've only ever had one job in a place I don't know my way round in, I refuse to ever go into again (yeah don't ask... I'm uncomfortable around large places where I have nothing to do besides look very very weird...)
11:13 Half an hour and I've already typed all that... meh....
I have $38 in my bank account... a bank account I don't know the details to! So I'm just a little bit away from actually having a spare $38 to spend.... the unfortunate thing about this is the global economic crisis has made this once wonderful and bountiful $38.... more like $24.... or.... some other number. I'm not sure! All I know is it's not worth as much and I wish it was worth more so I could shower people in chocolate... because then they'd completely overlook the fact that I didn't actually buy them a proper gift I just threw sugar and cocoa at them! BAAHHH! SUGAR! Another unfortunate thing is... this person also doesn't want to tell me what they want... (OK I understand your frustration thing that should not be... curse you Grace! Want something!... Wait... that's very ironic because I was saying I didn't want anything in particular! Curse! Curse you irony!) so the fact that I've known them for a year and a half is meant to mean that I can instantly see into their heads and figure out what they want?
OK I took a short break so take off 5 minutes from my final time to find out how long I've been typing.
I'm expected to know things!? *hyperventilates* I know she likes books but I don't know which ones she doesn't already have... She likes cheese but I don't really think cheese counts as a christmas present... and if it was flashy enough it'd probably be expensive. I don't know what she wants! The world needs to be a lot less materialistic and less expecting... like me... that way I get to keep whatever little money I have left and you're all happy with the hugs I give you as presents! My presence is a present! I know that sounds very vain but some people quite enjoy having me around...
Awww... I don't feel like I've said that much and I've pretty much run out of things to say! Grr...
Less than a month to find a christmas present... less than a month to think of it and buy it... OK this is the point where I mention that I am not comfortable around shops at all... OK I remember once someone wanted to take me with a bunch of people (girls... yes girls are people too guys...) and it was like "Oh so you don't like me at all and you secretly like to torture me by forcing me to do things now?" Nah it wasn't that dramatic it was more like *sad face* :( but yeah... I don't like shopping! If I want a CD I quickly walk in, find it as soon as I can and leave... JB-hi-fi is the closest I get to being comfortable... something about being surrounded by hundreds of heavy metal/alternative hard rock albums with bizarre and dark looking covers makes me feel at ease.... Alternative thrash metal is very relaxing... I can fall asleep to Rammstein and Disturbed.... but I use them in the car to keep my mother awake when she's driving me home at night... woo!
You want to know why? I feel so horrified. I let my innocence die. Want to know why I can't be pacified?
Then some other words... You're no immortal I won't let them deify you! They view you as the new messiah!
Anyhoo... It's relaxing to be surrounded by the familiar appearance of Metallica's St. Anger CD's and The Offspring's Greatest Hits, POD's When Angels and Serpent's Dance and then some other bands which I don't remember the names of.... but it's still uncomfortable because I'm surrounded by people and noise and I'm in a shop! Which freaks me out unless I'm with someone I know... and even then it's not the best thing to keep me relaxed... it can be freezing and I'll be taking off my jacket because I start to burn up... As soon as I have my CD's and I'm waiting in the line to pay for them I start to get uncomfortable... so I hate shopping and this means I'm really not liking the fact that I need to go out to some unfamiliar shop in the middle of a huge crowd of busy christmas shoppers to find something that I'm not sure what it is yet and wander around and wait in lines and talk to people I've never met... yes, I am incredibly dysfunctional and I'm starting to like Brooklyn's ideals more and more now... socialism! woo! Down with capitalism and having to go to shops and busy crowds! This is why I don't have a job... because I rarely ever get the courage to go look for one let alone actually try to apply for one... as soon as I find any excuse out of it I am not doing it! I have an application for Red Rooster or Chicken Treat or KFC or... in fact I don't even know where I was applying to but I was! Anyhoo, as soon as anything on it wasn't super obviously clear or I wasn't entirely sure what my response was (like... what hours I was free) then I put it to the side and have only recently discovered it when I got rid of all the 30 tonnes of school work and stuff and songs I've been writing and books I've been reading that I have piled up next to my reclining chair (That reclines! Whoa! Like lying down while sitting!) and I took a short look at it... and reburied it... I'll speak about my two foot tall (I measure it) mountain of schoolwork and exercise books I organised into one pile in my room for later sorting through to find what goes into the recycling and what stays... but back to the job thing... my idea of a perfect job...
...is blockbuster video...
not just any blockbuster video but the one near the rhino carwash near the small woolworths near that park... you know... the one that doesn't exist anymore? Yeah... I once went in there to get DVD's for my birthday party (I got caddyshack and shaun of the dead! woo!) because Video Ezy for the first time (*cough* no Dr Strange love *cough* or Elephant man but strangely enough Metropolis?) had failed me in not having something I wanted!... Something mainstream contemporary that I wanted that is... besides the occasional Arnold Swarztgahvbneggar movie (that's how you really spell his name!). Well I go into blockbuster and instantly realise that... this is the worst video store... of all time! It's... so bad! The DVD's were packed with the covers outwards instead of the spine (like a bookstore instead of a library...) and even then not all of the shelves were completely covered! And there was a very very big window covering most of the wall so a lot of those covers were faded due to the sunlight and I couldn't even find The Matrix Trilogy! What a selection! I did find the asian cinema in a basket down the bottom of a shelve in the corner though... I was happy that it existed which was a shock when considering what was around me... another thing that struck me was that there was only one other person who came through that door in the entire time I was there! This was an unwanted, unnatractive and pathetic video store with very high prices....
...I wanted to work there... I had to work there! I inquired if they had any jobs going and they said they had recently hired someone but I should hand in my resume and they'd consider me for the future so I go home and work on my resume... my... really sucky one... with nothing actually on it and big font just so it takes up a page (I have since learnt how to write a resume!) and I unfortunately never got round to handing it in because they closed down... you see the reasons why I wanted to work there was because I would be surrounded by movies (I like movies, I want to be a film director/writer) so it's nice, I get paid so it's nice, there's no one around which is nice and relaxing... these reasons why it's perfect for me to work there... is also the perfect reason why it would close down... and the other one nearby close down... there are still blockbuster video stores out there! But they are far away and more popular... grr... oh well... if I get paid by working at a library I'd love to do that :) It'd be nice... I'd be surrounded by books and everyone is quiet... :D
well yes... anyhoo, I am jobless, I am running out of money and will become bankrupt within the next few months if I keep this up (I bought tim tams for the picnic! And no one ate any!?) so yeah... oh well....
The make donations to the Save the Bilby foundation simply email me your bankaccount details at the following address.... nah just kidding. OK!
And speaking of weird/heavy metal bands (look up!) I have started listening to Opeth... again... yeah they are very interesting but their incredibly long songs (Over 10 minutes normally...) made me kinda bored at some point in time so I just avoided listening to them for other, shorter songs... To Bid you Farewell is over 10 minutes long and is kinda slow which is the song I probably got annoyed at... oh well... but yeah, after listening to Tool's 7-9 minute long songs (and even the really long ones of 11 minutes like Wings Prt 2 (11 minutes! Woo!) and some listening to Metallica's 6-9 minute long songs (Woo! "Creeping death" to "And Justice for All") I've gotten used to songs longer than 4 minutes... So I'm listening to Opeth now and Ghost of Perdition is really awesome :P And I've forgotten how to play it! Oh well...
Also, I downloaded the music video for Psychosocial by Slipknot (woo!) and I was watching it when my mother comes in... and she sees fire and some very strange looking men jumping around in dark clothes and wearing very dark and evil looking masks yelling "I did my time! And I want out! So abusive" ect and goes "WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO!?" and I calmly say "Psychosocial by Slipknot" "What is this!? Why are you listening to this!?" and that's when I decided that she had had enough of listening to the song and should probably stop it... she told me to discern what kinds of music I listen to and not just listen to any old thing... I don't think she actually knew what Slipknot was like she just saw a guy with spikes coming out of his head, what could only barely be called a clown (looks faarrrr to creepy these days to be a clown!) and a guy in a large metal mask with glowing red eyes and thought "This is evil..."... yes she's right they are evil and if she had continued to watch the music video she would've seen a burning pentagram in the ground but she didn't know that! She doesn't know that it's the kind of music she doesn't want me listening to! She just assumed.......... correctly...... oh well. I got in a small amount of trouble and was told off to listening to and watching Slipknot... well good thing I wasn't watching the video clip to A.D.I.D.A.S by KoRn! :P Man she would've gone truly psychotic over that! If she ever bothered to see what music is on the computer she really wouldn't like what she hears! Thankfully as soon as she hears the music she doesn't stick around for the lyrics... woo! She thinks Linkin Park yell too much and are too heavy... so there's no way she'd even try to listen to a Mudvayne song :D
Anyhoo... I should probably start my day... I got up and didn't do much... had some breakfast then decided that, because no one was online, I'd check this blog and the thing that should not be has kinda challenged me to blog so I did.... goodbye now I have a day to do things in! I am off to read New Moon! (It's so sad! Got to the bit with Edward and Bella in the woods just outside her house and she gets lost and yeah... and it's all very very sad and she starts crying and hopefully that's not vague enough so people who have read the book know what I'm talking about but vague enough so people who haven't read the book don't get any spoilers...) and I will hopefully do some more... Like continue writing a song or recycle the endless mountains of garbage I've accumulated over the year by going to school! Teachers hate trees! Don't deny it... you do... you hate trees, you hate free time and you hate the environment because it doesn't teach us anything about physics or the poetry of Sylvia plath! (Who is dead now... like the trees...)
I think I might burn it... mainly the maths stuff... oh! Btw, never decide you want to set fire to something that produces smoke next to the laundry! I rediscovered the sparklers I have stored in my cupboard and decided that I haven't seen a good sparkler fire in a while so I'd make a slow burning one out of bamboo so the bamboo (that doesn't burn very easily) will spurt out fire and I can hold it and wander around ect... good thing I could move it because I realised that I could smell a lot of smoke... and the wind was blowing this smoke right into the clothes left out to dry... this was bad... nothing says suspiscious like me walking into the house smelling of smoke and then everyone's clothes also smelling of smoke... so I had to quickly move it and yeah... my rabbit seemed to enjoy watching me and my flaming stick of death....
If only I had a CD I'd put it in the microwave like I did a few years ago... the school ordered me to destroy the CD so I did!
Anyway.... took a bit longer than I thought I would but yeah... see? Can't do that within 20 minutes...
12:20
P.S. This is over 6 pages long.... beat that thing that should not be! :)
P.P.S Now my arm feels weird... it's... weird! Left arm hurts and my right elbow (on the front... what's the front? the back is the elbow BUT WHAT IS THE FRONT!? AAAGGHHHHH!!!!!) it feels... I don't know how it feels it's like... warmth... under my skin that massages and sends strange strange sensations running through my arm... make it stop! Bah! It's like being on the edge of being tickled without being tickled... only being tickled from the inside outwards.... something's... happening to me... I can feel it... *heaves* uurtggh! rarr I have blogged to much I'm... I'm... turning into something... inhuman! rrarrrrr *burst through the window* I have gone to devour the flesh of noobs and people who spend too much time on internet forums! Arrooooo!!!
OK, Post edit... I'd just like to point out to The Thing that Should Not Be... that he has only written 7 and a half pages in 6 posts... I have only 5 posts (Including this one) and 1 of them is just the rules of this blog... so if you really want it's 4 posts actually blogging properly but lets just say 5... doesn't matter 5 posts and 13 pages. You have an average of 1.25 and I have an average of 2.6... you get the latest two entries I have written and those two combined is pretty much the same amount as you've written entirely... come on it's far too easy to catch up to you.... and you typed a lot even when it wasn't holidays! I'm quite enjoying this actually :D Means you can't lord anything over me... because I still type more than you even if my blogs aren't as common as yours.... btw, good to see you're finally putting titles to your posts... anyhoo I really should leave now for real... I might just make another blog entry and then you'd really be far behind on the amount of blogging I've been doing...
Also, cornflake has a draft for a blog she hasn't written anything in it... I wish she would she has such a lovely and interesting way of talking :) And Brooklyn has only written just over 2 pages but she has her own blog (just like me... check it out, you'll see why I don't blog much on this one...) so yeah... lord it over her :P We're both totally awesome and talk a lot... woo! We talk a lot!
OK! Just so you know it doesn't take me 20 minutes to write a blog Thing that should not be... 20 minutes isn't nearly enough to do that sort of thing! Apparently you and I disagree about a lot of things that you think only take 20 minutes (Hehehe ooooh he's so going to point out the lack of validity in that...) so I'm just going to time how long I take to blog... and blog I shall! You think you're the only one keeping this thing together? Well... OK you're kinda right but no one blogs as much as you! I posted 10 posts in a month on my other blog (http://www.thewindowofbilby.blogspot.com/ woo! shameless self promotion!) but I am kinda glad that someone (cornflake.... brooklyn.... all those other people I've invited but haven't joined... he's the only one who asked to be in it!) is actually taking this seriously and blogging... so woo! A clap for the thing that should not be... I am far too cruel to you sometimes let's clap some more.... (hehehe big head)
Well food is the secret weakness of all men... not just you. There's another weakness we all share but most girls aren't brave enough to tempt us with that in public... (Why the hell not? COME ON! We don't give a damn about going to buy new shoes with us! Give us an insentive to follow you around! Although it'll probably backfire and we'll just say "uhh... give me a moment I need to... sit down.... cross legged....")
Anyhoo, OK! I don't really write very long blogs on this blog (even though I've mentioned I do write bigs ones every now and then) so someone thinks they actually write long ones... no! wrong... they're not 3 pages long they aren't that big! So let's talk about something shall we?
Picnics! They are very nice things to do... even if they are just in your backyard on plastic chairs overlooking the sea (I was planning on a park but my feet don't like moving....) and all you've got to eat sandwich wise is jam and cheese... not at the same time but the thought of that actually crossed my mind at some time. I decided that it's probably not for the best if I decided to be bold and try jam on cheese.... (cheddar) it might cause the person I was with to lose her appetite. Now you think english/canadian accents are cute (Guys like girls from all countries! Especially countries that have never heard of the terrible terrible things those guys do in their spare time.... you know what I'm talking about thing that should not be! Eyes aren't the only red things... OK that was incredibly suggestive and I didn't actually have anything in specific to imply so let your own dirty mind twist that into whatever you didn't want to think about! THINK ABOUT IT!) well I think that scottish accents are far more appealing... I always have :P Scottish accents (the ones you can understand that is) are made of pure awesome and endless fun listening to some cute girl talk about cute things with a cute accent especially when they think that you are cute... :) woo! OK does this count as personal? I'm talking about picnics with a very special someone (who anyone who reads this blog should actually know.... woo! yeah 6 months and counting!)
IN JOKE TIME!
no... no I haven't used your present....
MAY NO ONE EVER... EVER mention what that in joke was about! EVER! (OK not exactly "joke" but you know... in... inny thingy that you don't need to know about but certain people reading this would want to know... possibly...) I shall hunt you down....
Clocks. Clocks are nice :) I have a clock that's shaped like a TV and it is an adorably cute little present that helps me know what time it is when I am in doubt of the clock right in front of me! (Which I normally have one because my house is filled with them.... and the one on the computer keeps changing so I went to bed at 1am when I thought it was only midnight....) but how do I top a little shiny TV shaped clock? My lovely scottish girl already has a watch! But who knows how long that'll last? (She is like an X-men.... watches stop working after a week due to constant contact with her... she's electric baby! yeeeaaaahhh! Feel the tingling sensation! Mmm-mm! Anyhoo... sorry to have broken your mind children... I just get excited when talking about that :P) basically...
Christmas is a time of fear....
I don't get people presents! I never have... I've never had the chance really. Don't normally see my friends over the long holidays and they never get me anything so I never expect to give anything back... I don't expect presents and I don't even really want them that much... I want one from my parents just as a nice little bonus to the free BBQ sausages I get on that day... that and the present/s make up for the fact I need to see my annoying little cousins who once saw Peter Pan on video when they were very little and decided to take the "never grow up" philosophy very very seriously... they are constantly annoying and act like little children... well... they are little children and have always been that way for as long as I remember but you'd think they'd be slightly older acting little children right? Oh well... I like the one who doesn't talk... she just sits there smiling and not talking... unfortunately she doesn't look creepy when she does it because that would be very cool! But anyhoo, I am very indifferent to getting presents (Yeah... hoorah for Grace! You rock girl!) and basically everytime my girlfriend asks me what I want I go "I want you with a little red ribbon on your head" and she goes "Awwww! That's so cute! But no seriously what do you want?" and I go "A hug" "You get hugs anyway" "and a kiss" "you get that too anyway!" ".... I want extra ones..." and it goes on like that until she figures out that Apocalyptica is currently one of my favourite bands that I am lacking in CD's of so has most likely decided to go out and get me their album Cult or Inquisition symphony... failing that (Which she most likely will because stupid CD stores decide that good music isn't popular enough to be in stores!) she's going to get me Metallica... which she can't fail at because that is popular enough to always have it's own column of CD's stacked tightly together so no one can help but notice it's assorted bands then METALLICA then other random bands... But yeah... I don't mind if no one gets me a gift because I always have such a dificult time coming up with one I really want... they ask me what I want and I go "I have to get back to you... I have to think of something then convince myself I want it just so you can buy it for me for money you could've spent on something else" (Only... not verbatim)
But now... now someone actually expects ME to get them a gift! What? I don't even have a job! And the only place I ever worked at was the place she works at now and she wants to quit because she got paid more serving bread to people! And I worked there for 5/6 hours! Yeah... I've only ever had one job in a place I don't know my way round in, I refuse to ever go into again (yeah don't ask... I'm uncomfortable around large places where I have nothing to do besides look very very weird...)
11:13 Half an hour and I've already typed all that... meh....
I have $38 in my bank account... a bank account I don't know the details to! So I'm just a little bit away from actually having a spare $38 to spend.... the unfortunate thing about this is the global economic crisis has made this once wonderful and bountiful $38.... more like $24.... or.... some other number. I'm not sure! All I know is it's not worth as much and I wish it was worth more so I could shower people in chocolate... because then they'd completely overlook the fact that I didn't actually buy them a proper gift I just threw sugar and cocoa at them! BAAHHH! SUGAR! Another unfortunate thing is... this person also doesn't want to tell me what they want... (OK I understand your frustration thing that should not be... curse you Grace! Want something!... Wait... that's very ironic because I was saying I didn't want anything in particular! Curse! Curse you irony!) so the fact that I've known them for a year and a half is meant to mean that I can instantly see into their heads and figure out what they want?
OK I took a short break so take off 5 minutes from my final time to find out how long I've been typing.
I'm expected to know things!? *hyperventilates* I know she likes books but I don't know which ones she doesn't already have... She likes cheese but I don't really think cheese counts as a christmas present... and if it was flashy enough it'd probably be expensive. I don't know what she wants! The world needs to be a lot less materialistic and less expecting... like me... that way I get to keep whatever little money I have left and you're all happy with the hugs I give you as presents! My presence is a present! I know that sounds very vain but some people quite enjoy having me around...
Awww... I don't feel like I've said that much and I've pretty much run out of things to say! Grr...
Less than a month to find a christmas present... less than a month to think of it and buy it... OK this is the point where I mention that I am not comfortable around shops at all... OK I remember once someone wanted to take me with a bunch of people (girls... yes girls are people too guys...) and it was like "Oh so you don't like me at all and you secretly like to torture me by forcing me to do things now?" Nah it wasn't that dramatic it was more like *sad face* :( but yeah... I don't like shopping! If I want a CD I quickly walk in, find it as soon as I can and leave... JB-hi-fi is the closest I get to being comfortable... something about being surrounded by hundreds of heavy metal/alternative hard rock albums with bizarre and dark looking covers makes me feel at ease.... Alternative thrash metal is very relaxing... I can fall asleep to Rammstein and Disturbed.... but I use them in the car to keep my mother awake when she's driving me home at night... woo!
You want to know why? I feel so horrified. I let my innocence die. Want to know why I can't be pacified?
Then some other words... You're no immortal I won't let them deify you! They view you as the new messiah!
Anyhoo... It's relaxing to be surrounded by the familiar appearance of Metallica's St. Anger CD's and The Offspring's Greatest Hits, POD's When Angels and Serpent's Dance and then some other bands which I don't remember the names of.... but it's still uncomfortable because I'm surrounded by people and noise and I'm in a shop! Which freaks me out unless I'm with someone I know... and even then it's not the best thing to keep me relaxed... it can be freezing and I'll be taking off my jacket because I start to burn up... As soon as I have my CD's and I'm waiting in the line to pay for them I start to get uncomfortable... so I hate shopping and this means I'm really not liking the fact that I need to go out to some unfamiliar shop in the middle of a huge crowd of busy christmas shoppers to find something that I'm not sure what it is yet and wander around and wait in lines and talk to people I've never met... yes, I am incredibly dysfunctional and I'm starting to like Brooklyn's ideals more and more now... socialism! woo! Down with capitalism and having to go to shops and busy crowds! This is why I don't have a job... because I rarely ever get the courage to go look for one let alone actually try to apply for one... as soon as I find any excuse out of it I am not doing it! I have an application for Red Rooster or Chicken Treat or KFC or... in fact I don't even know where I was applying to but I was! Anyhoo, as soon as anything on it wasn't super obviously clear or I wasn't entirely sure what my response was (like... what hours I was free) then I put it to the side and have only recently discovered it when I got rid of all the 30 tonnes of school work and stuff and songs I've been writing and books I've been reading that I have piled up next to my reclining chair (That reclines! Whoa! Like lying down while sitting!) and I took a short look at it... and reburied it... I'll speak about my two foot tall (I measure it) mountain of schoolwork and exercise books I organised into one pile in my room for later sorting through to find what goes into the recycling and what stays... but back to the job thing... my idea of a perfect job...
...is blockbuster video...
not just any blockbuster video but the one near the rhino carwash near the small woolworths near that park... you know... the one that doesn't exist anymore? Yeah... I once went in there to get DVD's for my birthday party (I got caddyshack and shaun of the dead! woo!) because Video Ezy for the first time (*cough* no Dr Strange love *cough* or Elephant man but strangely enough Metropolis?) had failed me in not having something I wanted!... Something mainstream contemporary that I wanted that is... besides the occasional Arnold Swarztgahvbneggar movie (that's how you really spell his name!). Well I go into blockbuster and instantly realise that... this is the worst video store... of all time! It's... so bad! The DVD's were packed with the covers outwards instead of the spine (like a bookstore instead of a library...) and even then not all of the shelves were completely covered! And there was a very very big window covering most of the wall so a lot of those covers were faded due to the sunlight and I couldn't even find The Matrix Trilogy! What a selection! I did find the asian cinema in a basket down the bottom of a shelve in the corner though... I was happy that it existed which was a shock when considering what was around me... another thing that struck me was that there was only one other person who came through that door in the entire time I was there! This was an unwanted, unnatractive and pathetic video store with very high prices....
...I wanted to work there... I had to work there! I inquired if they had any jobs going and they said they had recently hired someone but I should hand in my resume and they'd consider me for the future so I go home and work on my resume... my... really sucky one... with nothing actually on it and big font just so it takes up a page (I have since learnt how to write a resume!) and I unfortunately never got round to handing it in because they closed down... you see the reasons why I wanted to work there was because I would be surrounded by movies (I like movies, I want to be a film director/writer) so it's nice, I get paid so it's nice, there's no one around which is nice and relaxing... these reasons why it's perfect for me to work there... is also the perfect reason why it would close down... and the other one nearby close down... there are still blockbuster video stores out there! But they are far away and more popular... grr... oh well... if I get paid by working at a library I'd love to do that :) It'd be nice... I'd be surrounded by books and everyone is quiet... :D
well yes... anyhoo, I am jobless, I am running out of money and will become bankrupt within the next few months if I keep this up (I bought tim tams for the picnic! And no one ate any!?) so yeah... oh well....
The make donations to the Save the Bilby foundation simply email me your bankaccount details at the following address.... nah just kidding. OK!
And speaking of weird/heavy metal bands (look up!) I have started listening to Opeth... again... yeah they are very interesting but their incredibly long songs (Over 10 minutes normally...) made me kinda bored at some point in time so I just avoided listening to them for other, shorter songs... To Bid you Farewell is over 10 minutes long and is kinda slow which is the song I probably got annoyed at... oh well... but yeah, after listening to Tool's 7-9 minute long songs (and even the really long ones of 11 minutes like Wings Prt 2 (11 minutes! Woo!) and some listening to Metallica's 6-9 minute long songs (Woo! "Creeping death" to "And Justice for All") I've gotten used to songs longer than 4 minutes... So I'm listening to Opeth now and Ghost of Perdition is really awesome :P And I've forgotten how to play it! Oh well...
Also, I downloaded the music video for Psychosocial by Slipknot (woo!) and I was watching it when my mother comes in... and she sees fire and some very strange looking men jumping around in dark clothes and wearing very dark and evil looking masks yelling "I did my time! And I want out! So abusive" ect and goes "WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO!?" and I calmly say "Psychosocial by Slipknot" "What is this!? Why are you listening to this!?" and that's when I decided that she had had enough of listening to the song and should probably stop it... she told me to discern what kinds of music I listen to and not just listen to any old thing... I don't think she actually knew what Slipknot was like she just saw a guy with spikes coming out of his head, what could only barely be called a clown (looks faarrrr to creepy these days to be a clown!) and a guy in a large metal mask with glowing red eyes and thought "This is evil..."... yes she's right they are evil and if she had continued to watch the music video she would've seen a burning pentagram in the ground but she didn't know that! She doesn't know that it's the kind of music she doesn't want me listening to! She just assumed.......... correctly...... oh well. I got in a small amount of trouble and was told off to listening to and watching Slipknot... well good thing I wasn't watching the video clip to A.D.I.D.A.S by KoRn! :P Man she would've gone truly psychotic over that! If she ever bothered to see what music is on the computer she really wouldn't like what she hears! Thankfully as soon as she hears the music she doesn't stick around for the lyrics... woo! She thinks Linkin Park yell too much and are too heavy... so there's no way she'd even try to listen to a Mudvayne song :D
Anyhoo... I should probably start my day... I got up and didn't do much... had some breakfast then decided that, because no one was online, I'd check this blog and the thing that should not be has kinda challenged me to blog so I did.... goodbye now I have a day to do things in! I am off to read New Moon! (It's so sad! Got to the bit with Edward and Bella in the woods just outside her house and she gets lost and yeah... and it's all very very sad and she starts crying and hopefully that's not vague enough so people who have read the book know what I'm talking about but vague enough so people who haven't read the book don't get any spoilers...) and I will hopefully do some more... Like continue writing a song or recycle the endless mountains of garbage I've accumulated over the year by going to school! Teachers hate trees! Don't deny it... you do... you hate trees, you hate free time and you hate the environment because it doesn't teach us anything about physics or the poetry of Sylvia plath! (Who is dead now... like the trees...)
I think I might burn it... mainly the maths stuff... oh! Btw, never decide you want to set fire to something that produces smoke next to the laundry! I rediscovered the sparklers I have stored in my cupboard and decided that I haven't seen a good sparkler fire in a while so I'd make a slow burning one out of bamboo so the bamboo (that doesn't burn very easily) will spurt out fire and I can hold it and wander around ect... good thing I could move it because I realised that I could smell a lot of smoke... and the wind was blowing this smoke right into the clothes left out to dry... this was bad... nothing says suspiscious like me walking into the house smelling of smoke and then everyone's clothes also smelling of smoke... so I had to quickly move it and yeah... my rabbit seemed to enjoy watching me and my flaming stick of death....
If only I had a CD I'd put it in the microwave like I did a few years ago... the school ordered me to destroy the CD so I did!
Anyway.... took a bit longer than I thought I would but yeah... see? Can't do that within 20 minutes...
12:20
P.S. This is over 6 pages long.... beat that thing that should not be! :)
P.P.S Now my arm feels weird... it's... weird! Left arm hurts and my right elbow (on the front... what's the front? the back is the elbow BUT WHAT IS THE FRONT!? AAAGGHHHHH!!!!!) it feels... I don't know how it feels it's like... warmth... under my skin that massages and sends strange strange sensations running through my arm... make it stop! Bah! It's like being on the edge of being tickled without being tickled... only being tickled from the inside outwards.... something's... happening to me... I can feel it... *heaves* uurtggh! rarr I have blogged to much I'm... I'm... turning into something... inhuman! rrarrrrr *burst through the window* I have gone to devour the flesh of noobs and people who spend too much time on internet forums! Arrooooo!!!
OK, Post edit... I'd just like to point out to The Thing that Should Not Be... that he has only written 7 and a half pages in 6 posts... I have only 5 posts (Including this one) and 1 of them is just the rules of this blog... so if you really want it's 4 posts actually blogging properly but lets just say 5... doesn't matter 5 posts and 13 pages. You have an average of 1.25 and I have an average of 2.6... you get the latest two entries I have written and those two combined is pretty much the same amount as you've written entirely... come on it's far too easy to catch up to you.... and you typed a lot even when it wasn't holidays! I'm quite enjoying this actually :D Means you can't lord anything over me... because I still type more than you even if my blogs aren't as common as yours.... btw, good to see you're finally putting titles to your posts... anyhoo I really should leave now for real... I might just make another blog entry and then you'd really be far behind on the amount of blogging I've been doing...
Also, cornflake has a draft for a blog she hasn't written anything in it... I wish she would she has such a lovely and interesting way of talking :) And Brooklyn has only written just over 2 pages but she has her own blog (just like me... check it out, you'll see why I don't blog much on this one...) so yeah... lord it over her :P We're both totally awesome and talk a lot... woo! We talk a lot!
Tuesday, November 25, 2008
its over 9000!!!!!
come on guys, were's the love??? im like the only person who's posted anything recently. and cornflake, you havent posted anything at all. EVERYONE, HURRY UP AND BE INTERESTING!!! seriously, you've seen the shit i post, im sure you all can come up with something more interesting.
well my day today was pretty good. the girl at the icecream place was hitting on me, wich was quite nice actually. im not used to getting hit on by random cute girls. she was pretty, but she was one of those girls who seems a lot younger than they actually are, so it kinda put me off. anyway, she piled like 6 scoops on to my little cone, and the ending result was nearly as big as my head.
and for anyone thinking it, yes i am aware my head is big both metaphorically and physicaly. you dont have to draw attention to it, so keep your smart-ass comments to yourselves, ok???
good. now that we've cleared that up, were was i??? oh yes, and then the girl at dome was being really nice to me as well. im not sure if she was flirting or not, seriously i have a really hard time distinguishing between flirting and just being nice. aparently i flirt a fair bit, but i dont even know i am half the time. well the dome girl was pretty cute, she had a really nice accent, i think maybe canadian. but she had on WAAAAYYYY too much mascara, it was litterally clumping on her eyes, and every time she blinked i'd have to stop myself staring at the massive clumps of mascara that only got bigger the more she blinked. she gave me an extra hashbrown and an extra chippolata. how girls know my one weakness is food i will never understand. its not like im fat or anything, although with the ammount of food i eat i probably should be... but who am i to complain, right???
at whitfords i played the new guitar hero with some random dude who worked at jb-hifi for like an hour. it was really cool. the guy had good taste in music, and he seemed pretty cool, even though he had a slight lisp... we played living on a prayer about 3 times. it was epic. then my auntie decided to buy me christmas presents. she said i could spend 30 bucks. i wanted a papa roach cd, but that was only like 10 bucks. so then she said i could get something else, so i got the film wild things (wich by the way is very awsome and very sexy, go Neve Cambell!!!), but that was only 7 bucks, so she said i could get something else, so i got pulp fiction (FUCK YEAH!!!) on special for 13 bucks. 3 presents for the price of 1, im happy!!!
and i finally got baphomet! for those who dont know, baphomet was originally a pagean god of sorts who balanced the forces of light and darkness between his goat horns. nowadays, he is sort of seen as a powerful demon by most people, and some people even go so far as to call him the infernal baptiser, and say that it is baphomet who "baptises" those who enter hell, to show that their stay in hell will be a long and momentous one. anyway, the crystal reflections shop had this chain and pendant that had the sigil of baphomet on it (interestingly enough, the sigil of baphomet was actually used to represent the first church of satan in america), and i saw it and i really wanted it, like uber bad, but for the last 2 months they havent had it! i have quite literally dreamed about owning it several times, so when they said they had it in stock, i was needless to say very ecstatically happy. another cool thing but completely off the topic: baphomet had a goats head, and im a capricorn! thats gotta be lucky or something. its eyes glow red under juuuust the right light and then it looks very evil. i love it.
i am looking forward to grace and nina's party muchly as well. im probably going to end up getting nina something from the body shop. she said she likes stuff like that, and i am really desperate for ideas for her. grace, on the other hand, i still have no idea what to get her. man, she is so un-picky its not funny. i love her muchly, but seriously, when she sais anything i get her will be fine, it really doesnt make choosing something any easier! and il have to do all my shopping on friday, cause i wont get paid till thursday, and thursdays i hate going shopping cause everyone else is always shopping on thursdays and it pisses me off!
i got called into work last night cause no-one knew how to do the broiler maintenance for clean up, and ruby knows i like any excuse to see her. as i have said before, we dont like each other, we love each other! now i just gotta convince her that... yea they had this new girl called emily. she had a rrrreeeaaaaalllyyyy cute english accent, but like a right propper accent, like you's expect the queen to have. she was pretty, but she's aparently friends with this girl who i work with called brittany. brit can be nice and all at times, but she really likes to try and be a slut and tries to get around a lot. the funy thing is she only really gets with guys who dont know what her personality is like. she's hot, but seriously, after about an hour of putting up with her, you really have enough. i actually know several people named brittany who share this personallity trait..... lol kidding of course..... or am i???
anyway, to wrap things up, come on guy's, a little input every now and then, maybe at least once a week, would be muchly appreciated. i feel like im holding this thing together right now. lol no but seriously, make a little effort, just take 20 minutes out of your day to tell the world all about the little things that happen in your day and life.
well my day today was pretty good. the girl at the icecream place was hitting on me, wich was quite nice actually. im not used to getting hit on by random cute girls. she was pretty, but she was one of those girls who seems a lot younger than they actually are, so it kinda put me off. anyway, she piled like 6 scoops on to my little cone, and the ending result was nearly as big as my head.
and for anyone thinking it, yes i am aware my head is big both metaphorically and physicaly. you dont have to draw attention to it, so keep your smart-ass comments to yourselves, ok???
good. now that we've cleared that up, were was i??? oh yes, and then the girl at dome was being really nice to me as well. im not sure if she was flirting or not, seriously i have a really hard time distinguishing between flirting and just being nice. aparently i flirt a fair bit, but i dont even know i am half the time. well the dome girl was pretty cute, she had a really nice accent, i think maybe canadian. but she had on WAAAAYYYY too much mascara, it was litterally clumping on her eyes, and every time she blinked i'd have to stop myself staring at the massive clumps of mascara that only got bigger the more she blinked. she gave me an extra hashbrown and an extra chippolata. how girls know my one weakness is food i will never understand. its not like im fat or anything, although with the ammount of food i eat i probably should be... but who am i to complain, right???
at whitfords i played the new guitar hero with some random dude who worked at jb-hifi for like an hour. it was really cool. the guy had good taste in music, and he seemed pretty cool, even though he had a slight lisp... we played living on a prayer about 3 times. it was epic. then my auntie decided to buy me christmas presents. she said i could spend 30 bucks. i wanted a papa roach cd, but that was only like 10 bucks. so then she said i could get something else, so i got the film wild things (wich by the way is very awsome and very sexy, go Neve Cambell!!!), but that was only 7 bucks, so she said i could get something else, so i got pulp fiction (FUCK YEAH!!!) on special for 13 bucks. 3 presents for the price of 1, im happy!!!
and i finally got baphomet! for those who dont know, baphomet was originally a pagean god of sorts who balanced the forces of light and darkness between his goat horns. nowadays, he is sort of seen as a powerful demon by most people, and some people even go so far as to call him the infernal baptiser, and say that it is baphomet who "baptises" those who enter hell, to show that their stay in hell will be a long and momentous one. anyway, the crystal reflections shop had this chain and pendant that had the sigil of baphomet on it (interestingly enough, the sigil of baphomet was actually used to represent the first church of satan in america), and i saw it and i really wanted it, like uber bad, but for the last 2 months they havent had it! i have quite literally dreamed about owning it several times, so when they said they had it in stock, i was needless to say very ecstatically happy. another cool thing but completely off the topic: baphomet had a goats head, and im a capricorn! thats gotta be lucky or something. its eyes glow red under juuuust the right light and then it looks very evil. i love it.
i am looking forward to grace and nina's party muchly as well. im probably going to end up getting nina something from the body shop. she said she likes stuff like that, and i am really desperate for ideas for her. grace, on the other hand, i still have no idea what to get her. man, she is so un-picky its not funny. i love her muchly, but seriously, when she sais anything i get her will be fine, it really doesnt make choosing something any easier! and il have to do all my shopping on friday, cause i wont get paid till thursday, and thursdays i hate going shopping cause everyone else is always shopping on thursdays and it pisses me off!
i got called into work last night cause no-one knew how to do the broiler maintenance for clean up, and ruby knows i like any excuse to see her. as i have said before, we dont like each other, we love each other! now i just gotta convince her that... yea they had this new girl called emily. she had a rrrreeeaaaaalllyyyy cute english accent, but like a right propper accent, like you's expect the queen to have. she was pretty, but she's aparently friends with this girl who i work with called brittany. brit can be nice and all at times, but she really likes to try and be a slut and tries to get around a lot. the funy thing is she only really gets with guys who dont know what her personality is like. she's hot, but seriously, after about an hour of putting up with her, you really have enough. i actually know several people named brittany who share this personallity trait..... lol kidding of course..... or am i???
anyway, to wrap things up, come on guy's, a little input every now and then, maybe at least once a week, would be muchly appreciated. i feel like im holding this thing together right now. lol no but seriously, make a little effort, just take 20 minutes out of your day to tell the world all about the little things that happen in your day and life.
Saturday, November 22, 2008
darkness
the dark is generous.
its first gift is concealment: our true faces lie in dark beneath our skins, our true hearts remain shadowed deeper still. But the greatest concealment lies not in protecting our secret truths, but in hiding from us the truths of others.
the dark protects us from what we dare not know.
its second gift is comforting illusions: the ease of gentle dreams in nights embrace, the beauty that imagination brings to what would repel in days harsh light. But the greatest of its comforts is the illusion that the dark is temporary: that every night brings a new day. beacuse it is day that is temporary.
day is the illusion.
its third gift is the light itself: as days are defined by the nights that divide them, as stars are defined by the infinate black through wich they wheel, the dark embaces the light, and brings it forth from the center of its own self.
with each victory of the light, it is the dark that wins.
the dark is generous, and it is patient.
it is the dark that seeds cruelty into justice, that drips content into passion, that poisons love with grains of doubt. the dark can be patient, because the slightest drops of rain will cause those seeds to sprout.
the rain will come, and the seeds will sprout, for the dark is the soil in wich they grow, and it is the clouds above them, and it waits behind the stars that give them light. the darks patience is infinate.
eventually, even stars burn out.
the dark is generous, and it is patient, and it always wins.
it always wins because it is everywhere. it is in the wood that burns on the hearth, and in the kettle on the fire, it is under the chair and under the table and under the sheets on the bed. walk in the mid-day sun, and the dark is with you, clinging to the soles of your feet.
the brightest light casts the darkest shadow.
the dark is patient, and it is generous, and it always wins - but in the heart of its strength lies weakness: one lone candle is enough to hold it back.
love is more than a candle.
love can ignite the stars.
random. just thought i'd spin that by you all.
its first gift is concealment: our true faces lie in dark beneath our skins, our true hearts remain shadowed deeper still. But the greatest concealment lies not in protecting our secret truths, but in hiding from us the truths of others.
the dark protects us from what we dare not know.
its second gift is comforting illusions: the ease of gentle dreams in nights embrace, the beauty that imagination brings to what would repel in days harsh light. But the greatest of its comforts is the illusion that the dark is temporary: that every night brings a new day. beacuse it is day that is temporary.
day is the illusion.
its third gift is the light itself: as days are defined by the nights that divide them, as stars are defined by the infinate black through wich they wheel, the dark embaces the light, and brings it forth from the center of its own self.
with each victory of the light, it is the dark that wins.
the dark is generous, and it is patient.
it is the dark that seeds cruelty into justice, that drips content into passion, that poisons love with grains of doubt. the dark can be patient, because the slightest drops of rain will cause those seeds to sprout.
the rain will come, and the seeds will sprout, for the dark is the soil in wich they grow, and it is the clouds above them, and it waits behind the stars that give them light. the darks patience is infinate.
eventually, even stars burn out.
the dark is generous, and it is patient, and it always wins.
it always wins because it is everywhere. it is in the wood that burns on the hearth, and in the kettle on the fire, it is under the chair and under the table and under the sheets on the bed. walk in the mid-day sun, and the dark is with you, clinging to the soles of your feet.
the brightest light casts the darkest shadow.
the dark is patient, and it is generous, and it always wins - but in the heart of its strength lies weakness: one lone candle is enough to hold it back.
love is more than a candle.
love can ignite the stars.
random. just thought i'd spin that by you all.
Friday, November 21, 2008
my weakness
I’m sure the world is very interested (meant with sarcasm) but I feel the need to share the contents of my wardrobe. This is because I am amazed at my new addiction to clothes, especially dresses and skirts. Hypocritical of my beliefs against capitalism I know, but there’s something about a lovely print and good cut that I can’t resist. It all started when I got a job. I never cared much about what I wore before because the only way I could get anything was from my mother. Having an independent income however means I can spend when I want on what I want and so some of my favourite pieces....
Firstly, the LBD.....
To explain, although really I shouldn’t have to, the Little Black Dress- invented by Coco Chanel in 1926, it is the ultimate classic, a must have, and a major weakness for me. Always flattering, it’s the sort of dress that can be dressed up or down and worn everywhere. You always look gorgeous in it. I have three. One has longer sleeves and can be worn in winter. The other two I got from my cousins, the ultimate plus of being the baby in a family of mostly girls. I can never pass a shop that has a LBD on display. Mind you there is nothing worse than a badly designed dress, and the LBD is hard to perfect. Because of this, shopping for one is a major blow to the self-esteem. However, it’s worth it to find the right one. Then wearing it becomes the ultimate pick-me-up. Everyone has that outfit that makes them feel better about themselves just by wearing it. Mine is some kinda dress.....
Maybe the world’s problems could be solved if more people found their perfect LBD. Would Hitler have killed so many if he found the right cut to complement his figure? Would King Richard have gone on the Crusades if there was the perfect print to bring out the colour of his eyes? Maybe George W just needed the right style and he would have done a better job............There’s some mental images you really didn’t need........anyway.......
Tomorrow night I am going to my cousin’s engagement and wearing the most beautiful white summer dress. I thank my mother for this find. Full length skirt, shoe-string straps that cross over at the back and lots of lace.
Another summer dress I have also has lace......... pretty pink too with floral pattern.....
The perfect place to shop for me is at Hillary’s boat harbour. I can never leave without spending something. In two days I had three dresses, a skirt, a top, pair of earrings and a necklace. Hopeless I know...........
I got my ball dress for this year from there too. Purple and white it was perfect and I love it to death!
But finally there is THE DRESS, the one I’m wearing to next year’s ball. Although I don’t have it yet. I’ve paid for it all, it’s just I need it fitted and there’s no point doing it before Christmas because I’m only going to stuff my face over the holidays. I love it so ridiculously much. It was one of those perfect moments in the movies where the light hits the fabric and angels start singing in the background.............. ok, maybe it’s not that great, but to me it’s wonderful and since I’m the one wearing it, isn’t that what counts? Don’t comment please, there’s bound to be someone who disagrees.
It is embarrassing for me though to admit that I have my dress organised for next year because I spent the weeks leading up to finding it talking about how stupid it was all these girls so focused on ball and already knew what they were wearing. Spoke too soon I guess. At least I can have fun finding the shoes and the bag...........
I better stop before I start giving detailed descriptions; I’ve probably already bored people to death!!!!
But check it out! I’m actually a superficial and shallow girly-girl! Where did my socialist values go? How can I sacrifice all my beliefs on the evils of capitalism, materialism and commercialism just for a pretty piece of material? Why?! WHY?!
Firstly, the LBD.....
To explain, although really I shouldn’t have to, the Little Black Dress- invented by Coco Chanel in 1926, it is the ultimate classic, a must have, and a major weakness for me. Always flattering, it’s the sort of dress that can be dressed up or down and worn everywhere. You always look gorgeous in it. I have three. One has longer sleeves and can be worn in winter. The other two I got from my cousins, the ultimate plus of being the baby in a family of mostly girls. I can never pass a shop that has a LBD on display. Mind you there is nothing worse than a badly designed dress, and the LBD is hard to perfect. Because of this, shopping for one is a major blow to the self-esteem. However, it’s worth it to find the right one. Then wearing it becomes the ultimate pick-me-up. Everyone has that outfit that makes them feel better about themselves just by wearing it. Mine is some kinda dress.....
Maybe the world’s problems could be solved if more people found their perfect LBD. Would Hitler have killed so many if he found the right cut to complement his figure? Would King Richard have gone on the Crusades if there was the perfect print to bring out the colour of his eyes? Maybe George W just needed the right style and he would have done a better job............There’s some mental images you really didn’t need........anyway.......
Tomorrow night I am going to my cousin’s engagement and wearing the most beautiful white summer dress. I thank my mother for this find. Full length skirt, shoe-string straps that cross over at the back and lots of lace.
Another summer dress I have also has lace......... pretty pink too with floral pattern.....
The perfect place to shop for me is at Hillary’s boat harbour. I can never leave without spending something. In two days I had three dresses, a skirt, a top, pair of earrings and a necklace. Hopeless I know...........
I got my ball dress for this year from there too. Purple and white it was perfect and I love it to death!
But finally there is THE DRESS, the one I’m wearing to next year’s ball. Although I don’t have it yet. I’ve paid for it all, it’s just I need it fitted and there’s no point doing it before Christmas because I’m only going to stuff my face over the holidays. I love it so ridiculously much. It was one of those perfect moments in the movies where the light hits the fabric and angels start singing in the background.............. ok, maybe it’s not that great, but to me it’s wonderful and since I’m the one wearing it, isn’t that what counts? Don’t comment please, there’s bound to be someone who disagrees.
It is embarrassing for me though to admit that I have my dress organised for next year because I spent the weeks leading up to finding it talking about how stupid it was all these girls so focused on ball and already knew what they were wearing. Spoke too soon I guess. At least I can have fun finding the shoes and the bag...........
I better stop before I start giving detailed descriptions; I’ve probably already bored people to death!!!!
But check it out! I’m actually a superficial and shallow girly-girl! Where did my socialist values go? How can I sacrifice all my beliefs on the evils of capitalism, materialism and commercialism just for a pretty piece of material? Why?! WHY?!
music!!!
ahh, fuck it. i wanted to go on abiig random rant about something of no significance, but its early, im tired, i have a chem exam, and i have to get up for work at 4am tomorow. fucking hj's.....
instead im going to post song lyrics, and if anyone knows the song, then you must reply or comment or something telling me how smart you are!
your broken so am i, im better off alone, no-one to turn to and nothing to call my own
one last thing i beg you please, just before you go, i watched you fly on paper wings, halfway round the world, until they burnt up in the atmosphere, sent you spiraling down, landing somewhere far from here, with no-one else around
i am a slave and i am a master, no restraints and unchecked collectors, i exist through my need to slef oblidge, she is something in me, that i despise
when the priest comes to read me the last rights, take a look to the crowd of the last sights, of a world that has gone very wrong for me
im over existing in limbo, im over the myths and placebo's, i dont really mind if i just fade away
if i had to, i would put myself right beside you, so let me ask, would you like that??? would you like that???
does it make you happy??? are you feeling happy??? are you fucking happy, now that im lost left with nothing???
its in your head, all the voices mistaken, shake it off, shake it off, were all dying in the end
she taught me how to trust, and to believe in us, and then she taught me how to cuss, that bitch, its over!
tell me when im gonna live again, tell me when this fear will end, tell me when im gonna live inside, tell me when im gonna feel alright
i feel so, much better, now that your gone forever
my body aches from mistakes, betrayed by lust, we lie to each other so much, that in nothing we trust
you do it to yourself, thats what really hurts, is you do it to yourself
as i was going over the cork and kerry mountains, i saw captain ferrel, said his money he was counting, i first produced my pistol, then produced my rapier, i said stand and deliver, oh, or the devil he may take ya
if you are dead or still alive, i dont care, i dont care
nothing comes taht easy, and nothing comes for free, somethign comes from nothing if your willing to believe
all the problems make me want to go, like a bad girl straight to video, little darling welcome tot he show, your a failure played in stereo
so drill it, so drill it, so hard, feel it
i shut the door and traveled to another home, i met an older man he seemed to be alone
the sun goes down, i feel the light betray me
good luck with your guessing guys!!!
instead im going to post song lyrics, and if anyone knows the song, then you must reply or comment or something telling me how smart you are!
your broken so am i, im better off alone, no-one to turn to and nothing to call my own
one last thing i beg you please, just before you go, i watched you fly on paper wings, halfway round the world, until they burnt up in the atmosphere, sent you spiraling down, landing somewhere far from here, with no-one else around
i am a slave and i am a master, no restraints and unchecked collectors, i exist through my need to slef oblidge, she is something in me, that i despise
when the priest comes to read me the last rights, take a look to the crowd of the last sights, of a world that has gone very wrong for me
im over existing in limbo, im over the myths and placebo's, i dont really mind if i just fade away
if i had to, i would put myself right beside you, so let me ask, would you like that??? would you like that???
does it make you happy??? are you feeling happy??? are you fucking happy, now that im lost left with nothing???
its in your head, all the voices mistaken, shake it off, shake it off, were all dying in the end
she taught me how to trust, and to believe in us, and then she taught me how to cuss, that bitch, its over!
tell me when im gonna live again, tell me when this fear will end, tell me when im gonna live inside, tell me when im gonna feel alright
i feel so, much better, now that your gone forever
my body aches from mistakes, betrayed by lust, we lie to each other so much, that in nothing we trust
you do it to yourself, thats what really hurts, is you do it to yourself
as i was going over the cork and kerry mountains, i saw captain ferrel, said his money he was counting, i first produced my pistol, then produced my rapier, i said stand and deliver, oh, or the devil he may take ya
if you are dead or still alive, i dont care, i dont care
nothing comes taht easy, and nothing comes for free, somethign comes from nothing if your willing to believe
all the problems make me want to go, like a bad girl straight to video, little darling welcome tot he show, your a failure played in stereo
so drill it, so drill it, so hard, feel it
i shut the door and traveled to another home, i met an older man he seemed to be alone
the sun goes down, i feel the light betray me
good luck with your guessing guys!!!
Sunday, November 16, 2008
my auntie is under the impression that she is haunted. she was telling me today that she was driving in her car, and she heard this very loud buzzing noise. you know how people have remotes for their garage doors??? well hers was on her dashboard, and it was buzzing and vibrating like crazy, and then aparently it flew into the back seat, buzzing like a wasp, and then as it hit the seat, it lay still.....
creepy stuff!!!
and she swears she keeps hearing her phone ringing when she's in the shower or other completely random places. ooooh, haunted aunty!
of course this could of course justbe some sort of histeria. like today at work for example. so many people came in and ordered inceadibly stupid things without meaning to. some lady asked for a pancake wrap for breakfast, another person asked if we sold any quarter burgers, and someone else wanted a "double ultimate super whopper thingo. you know, the one that comes with fries and a drink" but my personal favourite was from a rather pretty lady asking for a Mcwhopper meal. when she ordered that, pretty much everybody working at the time just turned around, walked into the crew room, and burst out laughing. it was quite hilarious.
anyway, back to my point, i think it could just be some sort of mass histeria. or maybe my auntie simply hasnt been taking her sanity pills lately. but i have myself noticed some rather strange things happening lately, such as things moving around the house and misteriously dissapearing. about two months ago, one morning i woke up, and as i always do when i wake up, i opened my eyes. and every morning when i wake up and open my eyes, i look out my bedroom door (you know, to see if any escaped mass murderers are skulking around outside waiting to kill me when im still asleep. man i wish i was joking about that, but thats honestly the reason i do, along with being suspicious that ghosts are watching my dreams as i sleep). anyway, this particular morning when i opened my eyes and looked out my door, i saw what looked like my little sister running past my door. only she was wearing a white dress, i didnt get a good glimpse at her face, and she was kinda blurred. you when you've had your eyes closed for ages and you open them and see something moving and it looks blurred cause your eyes have been shut??? well it was kinda like that.
anyway, i got up and i walked to my door to see what the hell my 7 year old sister was doing running around the house at (glances at clock) 6 am! so i got to the door, looked around it, and i didnt see anyone. then i looked into my sisters room (wich is next to mine), and she was fast asleep in her bed. later when she woke up i asked her if she had been running around the house at 6 am, to which she looked at me in the way little kids do when they think your going crazy, and said no, i was asleep silly.
i like to believe it was something paranormal, but probably i was just hallucinating or still dreaming or something.
but a few weeks later my other sister (who i care for a great deal less than my little one) came out one night after my little sister had gone to bed and said that she had seen her running around up the corridor. we went to her room, and of course she was fast asleep, and she became very grumpy when we awoke her to question her about wether or not she had been running up and down the corridor.
so maybe my family is haunted after all. SHWEEEEET!!! i always wondered what it would be like to be haunted. lol this is going to be fun. now all i have to do is wait till blood starts pouring from the walls and mysterious voices start telling me to kill. well, mysterious voices that dont originate in my head.
creepy stuff!!!
and she swears she keeps hearing her phone ringing when she's in the shower or other completely random places. ooooh, haunted aunty!
of course this could of course justbe some sort of histeria. like today at work for example. so many people came in and ordered inceadibly stupid things without meaning to. some lady asked for a pancake wrap for breakfast, another person asked if we sold any quarter burgers, and someone else wanted a "double ultimate super whopper thingo. you know, the one that comes with fries and a drink" but my personal favourite was from a rather pretty lady asking for a Mcwhopper meal. when she ordered that, pretty much everybody working at the time just turned around, walked into the crew room, and burst out laughing. it was quite hilarious.
anyway, back to my point, i think it could just be some sort of mass histeria. or maybe my auntie simply hasnt been taking her sanity pills lately. but i have myself noticed some rather strange things happening lately, such as things moving around the house and misteriously dissapearing. about two months ago, one morning i woke up, and as i always do when i wake up, i opened my eyes. and every morning when i wake up and open my eyes, i look out my bedroom door (you know, to see if any escaped mass murderers are skulking around outside waiting to kill me when im still asleep. man i wish i was joking about that, but thats honestly the reason i do, along with being suspicious that ghosts are watching my dreams as i sleep). anyway, this particular morning when i opened my eyes and looked out my door, i saw what looked like my little sister running past my door. only she was wearing a white dress, i didnt get a good glimpse at her face, and she was kinda blurred. you when you've had your eyes closed for ages and you open them and see something moving and it looks blurred cause your eyes have been shut??? well it was kinda like that.
anyway, i got up and i walked to my door to see what the hell my 7 year old sister was doing running around the house at (glances at clock) 6 am! so i got to the door, looked around it, and i didnt see anyone. then i looked into my sisters room (wich is next to mine), and she was fast asleep in her bed. later when she woke up i asked her if she had been running around the house at 6 am, to which she looked at me in the way little kids do when they think your going crazy, and said no, i was asleep silly.
i like to believe it was something paranormal, but probably i was just hallucinating or still dreaming or something.
but a few weeks later my other sister (who i care for a great deal less than my little one) came out one night after my little sister had gone to bed and said that she had seen her running around up the corridor. we went to her room, and of course she was fast asleep, and she became very grumpy when we awoke her to question her about wether or not she had been running up and down the corridor.
so maybe my family is haunted after all. SHWEEEEET!!! i always wondered what it would be like to be haunted. lol this is going to be fun. now all i have to do is wait till blood starts pouring from the walls and mysterious voices start telling me to kill. well, mysterious voices that dont originate in my head.
Saturday, November 15, 2008
Eulogy
What would one say if they were to write their own eulogy? The answer: a lot less than than anyone else... "I was a person... I didn't achieve anything and now I can't... I suck, I'm a loser and I'm sorry I caused you all pain from dying I guess my existence was a bad thing..." if you're reading this and thinking "Yep that's about right" then you my friend ARE SO VERY WRONG! WRONG! WRONG! WRONG! There is a reason why we don't write our own eulogies and it's not just because we're dead! It's because when we see a mirror we see less then your friend sees looking at you... the world can be so very cruel but we are the cruelest of them all to ourselves... if you think you suck your opinion is wrong... and in the reverse for the vain and selfish: if you think you are the greatest thing around your opinion is incredibly wrong... the vain are evil and pathetic and those who view themselves as pathetic are sometimes very wonderful people :)
Oh how cruel the world would be if it would only judge itself...
Well eulogies may seem overly done and they go on about how nice people are and how wonderful they were during life and you think "OK I knew that person they weren't really that great..." then think that the same will happen with you and no one will actually care and it's just common courtesy to show up to someones funeral... you have to be one cold son of a hobo to not go to a friends funeral. Well once again these sort of people are WRONG! OK so far their only failing seems to be they can't realise their own potential.... or not even potential... they don't realise what they do and the things they do and jsut how great they really are sometimes. It's really sad because I have this certain need to help people (OK let's hope this doesn't border on personal information here or I start to break my own rules as stated in the first blog entry...) and I don't feel like I've done or achieved anything unless I help others feel good about themselves... kinda annoying if you want to take over the world... because you have to do it with mild nagging but then going "Sorry am I annoying you? I'll stop.... but you know, what could I do to make you give in though? In a nice way though...." so I instinctively find people who are... "Broken" because they have enough problems with them to make them feel better every now and then when I try to solve these problems... sometimes I succeed (if only temporarily) and somtimes I fail...
... it's very annoying when I fail... because I have to live with knowing that the person I was trying to make feel better is still broken.... I really wish some people would just open their eyes, look in the mirror and think "Hey... I actually look good..." or write and essay and go "Hey... I actually am proud of what I wrote" or look at two marks, one AMASINGLY GOOD and one that wasn't and go "Yay! I did really well in one assessment!" instead of focusing completely on the worse mark... if only that person listened to the people around them trying to reassure them they'd feel so much better... it's just annoying looking at a person and seeing that they are so absorbed in their own little delusions that they are worthless that nothing you say can help them feel good about anything.... I feel sad because they're sad... and now I sound kinda vain "I know YOU have a problem but please stop having it! You're making ME sad now!" but everything can be twisted to be either good or bad... I have proved this with my latest media project... I took my archrival, documented him making his media project (It was on reality TV) and he is pretty much #1 TOP student for the year in media, absolutely brilliant and when he gets and assignment he goes all out and hands in 20 pages of work when everyone else does 2-5.... then I made him and his group, look abusive, violent and dysfunctional.... now if you can edit footage to make someone look completely different to who they are then surely someone with the paranoid delusion that no one cares can twist things around them to make it all look negative...
You're not perfect... the world's not perfect....
... give up?
.... accept this and realise you did a pretty darn good job given the fact no one can be perfect?
Which one do you choose? If you chose the first one then you get a free hug *Hug* OK feel better now? If not... I am not letting you go until you do... the world cares a lot more about those who care nothing about themselves then you would think....
Eulogy:
A brilliant person, kind, caring, loving, self loathing and deluded into thinking they weren't worth anything... if they looked back on their lives they'd see nothing but failure... But when everyone else looks back on that persons life we see non-stop laughs. We see someone who held themselves back but still managed to do some pretty decent things with their life... they might have raised kids, they might have written a book, they might have done so much but never really appreciated it. We did...
If they could see how dearly they will be missed... they'd have realised just what they meant to us all :)
...Hoorah for the broken....
--Dedicated 15 Nov 2008 to a wonderful person :) May mirrors one day be your friend
Oh how cruel the world would be if it would only judge itself...
Well eulogies may seem overly done and they go on about how nice people are and how wonderful they were during life and you think "OK I knew that person they weren't really that great..." then think that the same will happen with you and no one will actually care and it's just common courtesy to show up to someones funeral... you have to be one cold son of a hobo to not go to a friends funeral. Well once again these sort of people are WRONG! OK so far their only failing seems to be they can't realise their own potential.... or not even potential... they don't realise what they do and the things they do and jsut how great they really are sometimes. It's really sad because I have this certain need to help people (OK let's hope this doesn't border on personal information here or I start to break my own rules as stated in the first blog entry...) and I don't feel like I've done or achieved anything unless I help others feel good about themselves... kinda annoying if you want to take over the world... because you have to do it with mild nagging but then going "Sorry am I annoying you? I'll stop.... but you know, what could I do to make you give in though? In a nice way though...." so I instinctively find people who are... "Broken" because they have enough problems with them to make them feel better every now and then when I try to solve these problems... sometimes I succeed (if only temporarily) and somtimes I fail...
... it's very annoying when I fail... because I have to live with knowing that the person I was trying to make feel better is still broken.... I really wish some people would just open their eyes, look in the mirror and think "Hey... I actually look good..." or write and essay and go "Hey... I actually am proud of what I wrote" or look at two marks, one AMASINGLY GOOD and one that wasn't and go "Yay! I did really well in one assessment!" instead of focusing completely on the worse mark... if only that person listened to the people around them trying to reassure them they'd feel so much better... it's just annoying looking at a person and seeing that they are so absorbed in their own little delusions that they are worthless that nothing you say can help them feel good about anything.... I feel sad because they're sad... and now I sound kinda vain "I know YOU have a problem but please stop having it! You're making ME sad now!" but everything can be twisted to be either good or bad... I have proved this with my latest media project... I took my archrival, documented him making his media project (It was on reality TV) and he is pretty much #1 TOP student for the year in media, absolutely brilliant and when he gets and assignment he goes all out and hands in 20 pages of work when everyone else does 2-5.... then I made him and his group, look abusive, violent and dysfunctional.... now if you can edit footage to make someone look completely different to who they are then surely someone with the paranoid delusion that no one cares can twist things around them to make it all look negative...
You're not perfect... the world's not perfect....
... give up?
.... accept this and realise you did a pretty darn good job given the fact no one can be perfect?
Which one do you choose? If you chose the first one then you get a free hug *Hug* OK feel better now? If not... I am not letting you go until you do... the world cares a lot more about those who care nothing about themselves then you would think....
Eulogy:
A brilliant person, kind, caring, loving, self loathing and deluded into thinking they weren't worth anything... if they looked back on their lives they'd see nothing but failure... But when everyone else looks back on that persons life we see non-stop laughs. We see someone who held themselves back but still managed to do some pretty decent things with their life... they might have raised kids, they might have written a book, they might have done so much but never really appreciated it. We did...
If they could see how dearly they will be missed... they'd have realised just what they meant to us all :)
...Hoorah for the broken....
--Dedicated 15 Nov 2008 to a wonderful person :) May mirrors one day be your friend
Friday, November 14, 2008
You know who I envy??
you know who i envy??? people who care only for themselves. they have it really easy. i wish i could be like them. seriously, when you stop and think about it, they really lead a very fulfilling life. when you only care about yourself, you stop caring about the consequences of your actions. there are SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO many things i have wanted to do over the years, but many times one of the little voices in my head decides to come along and say "stop! think about what your doing. wont it hurt someone???" yea, but according to the butterfly effect theory, wherein a flap of a butterflies wings could result in a hurricane elsewere in the world, no matter what i do i am bound to hurt someone somewhere in the world. but unfortunately, i choose to listen to the voice in my head and stop. why??? because it so happens the people i would affect directly happen to be my best friends like it or not, and i dearly love them all. so, because i happen to care about my closest and absolutely lovely friends, i hold back on doing a lot of things i want to. its shit. i hate it. then i remember i probably would have hurt someone, and i begrudgingly admit defeat for now....
when you care only about yourself, every expense is significantly sliced into tiny little ribbons. if you only cared about yourself, then you would most likely live alone, and living alone you would only have to pay for whatever it is you need at the time. no paying electricity bills for massive foxtell prizepacks that only get watched once and then not even by you, no more paying for expensive water bills because someone other tahn you likes to take exceedingly long showers, no more driving down to the police station in the middle of the night and wasting 20 bucks of petrol because someone you know got caught doing something illeagle and wants you to bail them out. theres another expense, bail money! man, life sure is cheap when you dont have to pay for other people. i did a little test the other week: i withdrew 100 dollars from my account and set about spending it. i ended up spending 10 dollars on my lunch, 40 dollars on lunch for other people, 20 dollars on a cd my friend saw and said he's pay me back (wich he never did), and another 20 dollars on a birthday present for someone. all in all, i spent 10 out of 100 dollars on myself. the rest all went to my friends. see, if i only cared about myself, i would still actually have money in my account for my daily V and icecream for breakfast, but no, unfortunately i am not a self-centered asshole.
when you care only about yourself, life in general becomes a lot more bearable. no more calling in sick from work because your friends are having a party and want you to come, no more waiting for weeks on end to recieve back stuff you have lent to people, no more waiting in line at the bank carrying a shotgun and being too nice of a person to actually start blowing peoples faces off. man, you have no idea how many times i have felt like doing that to someone. anywho, back to my pointless and confusing tangeant: life is more bearable when every body else becomes insignificant fucking specks in your mind just waiting to be blown away at point blank range by the twin loaded shells of my 12 gauge pump action shotgun! woo, violence!
but unfortunately for me, i am not a self centered asshole of a person. so life is not more bearable, life is not less expensive, and my built up rage at not being able to do some of the things i want to only rises day by day. but in a way, i am glad. if i only cared about myself, i wouldnt put half as much effort into being nice to everyone. i hate being seen as a nice person, but apparently i am no matter how hard i try not to be. so anyway, if i was self obsessed, i wouldnt have any of the firends i have today. my friends are my one true family, and i love them all more than words can say.
as a footnote, i would also like to point out my dislike of people who claim to be self centered and butt-holes, but in actual fact arent. take my absolutely awsome and gorgeous friend who shall be refered to as B, as an example: she claims that she is an incredibly evil and self obsessing bitch, yet i have seen strong evidence to suggest otherwise. she is one of those people who likes to think that she is evil and non caring of others, but deep down i know she really cares alot for everyone, perhaps even a little too much for her own good. i kinda see why she does it though, but i cant be bothered listing those reasons. anyway, she claims to be very narcistic, and indeed she sometimes can be when the situation rises, but i know, and she knows i know, that she really is an awsome and caring person somewhere deep down amongst all the evil and hatred and dreams of my paonful horrible death. she actually has had quite a few dreams like that, including one were i drowned myself in vermilion paint (wich is funny as one of my favourite songs ever is vermilion by slipknot). but me and her share this obsession with being seen as evil and hatefilled, she's just a lot better at acting the part.
so back to my original statement, i envy people who care for no-one but themselves, but even though i like to be seen as one of them, i would probably hate it. i couldnt give up my friends, no matter how money grubbing and attention demanding they are.
and in your face bilby P. dalgyte: your not the only one who can write a very long and pointless blog that ammounts to nothing! hahaha!
when you care only about yourself, every expense is significantly sliced into tiny little ribbons. if you only cared about yourself, then you would most likely live alone, and living alone you would only have to pay for whatever it is you need at the time. no paying electricity bills for massive foxtell prizepacks that only get watched once and then not even by you, no more paying for expensive water bills because someone other tahn you likes to take exceedingly long showers, no more driving down to the police station in the middle of the night and wasting 20 bucks of petrol because someone you know got caught doing something illeagle and wants you to bail them out. theres another expense, bail money! man, life sure is cheap when you dont have to pay for other people. i did a little test the other week: i withdrew 100 dollars from my account and set about spending it. i ended up spending 10 dollars on my lunch, 40 dollars on lunch for other people, 20 dollars on a cd my friend saw and said he's pay me back (wich he never did), and another 20 dollars on a birthday present for someone. all in all, i spent 10 out of 100 dollars on myself. the rest all went to my friends. see, if i only cared about myself, i would still actually have money in my account for my daily V and icecream for breakfast, but no, unfortunately i am not a self-centered asshole.
when you care only about yourself, life in general becomes a lot more bearable. no more calling in sick from work because your friends are having a party and want you to come, no more waiting for weeks on end to recieve back stuff you have lent to people, no more waiting in line at the bank carrying a shotgun and being too nice of a person to actually start blowing peoples faces off. man, you have no idea how many times i have felt like doing that to someone. anywho, back to my pointless and confusing tangeant: life is more bearable when every body else becomes insignificant fucking specks in your mind just waiting to be blown away at point blank range by the twin loaded shells of my 12 gauge pump action shotgun! woo, violence!
but unfortunately for me, i am not a self centered asshole of a person. so life is not more bearable, life is not less expensive, and my built up rage at not being able to do some of the things i want to only rises day by day. but in a way, i am glad. if i only cared about myself, i wouldnt put half as much effort into being nice to everyone. i hate being seen as a nice person, but apparently i am no matter how hard i try not to be. so anyway, if i was self obsessed, i wouldnt have any of the firends i have today. my friends are my one true family, and i love them all more than words can say.
as a footnote, i would also like to point out my dislike of people who claim to be self centered and butt-holes, but in actual fact arent. take my absolutely awsome and gorgeous friend who shall be refered to as B, as an example: she claims that she is an incredibly evil and self obsessing bitch, yet i have seen strong evidence to suggest otherwise. she is one of those people who likes to think that she is evil and non caring of others, but deep down i know she really cares alot for everyone, perhaps even a little too much for her own good. i kinda see why she does it though, but i cant be bothered listing those reasons. anyway, she claims to be very narcistic, and indeed she sometimes can be when the situation rises, but i know, and she knows i know, that she really is an awsome and caring person somewhere deep down amongst all the evil and hatred and dreams of my paonful horrible death. she actually has had quite a few dreams like that, including one were i drowned myself in vermilion paint (wich is funny as one of my favourite songs ever is vermilion by slipknot). but me and her share this obsession with being seen as evil and hatefilled, she's just a lot better at acting the part.
so back to my original statement, i envy people who care for no-one but themselves, but even though i like to be seen as one of them, i would probably hate it. i couldnt give up my friends, no matter how money grubbing and attention demanding they are.
and in your face bilby P. dalgyte: your not the only one who can write a very long and pointless blog that ammounts to nothing! hahaha!
My hard earnt dollar :)
Well OK! I'd like to start off by saying woo! Thankyou to all the current authors on this blog who have all posted their first blogs :P (On this blog of course, Brooklyn has her own blog) I have enjoyed reading them all and even if they are about nothing: that's sorta the point... so yeah. Woo! A special shoutout to the self-entitled Cornflake, Socialist and Psychopath of this blog and I just want to say you are all awesome :) Even if your blogs seem to revolve around self-deprecation...
Anyhoo, I'm not sure what I should do now... because I have two blogs... both of which are pretty much the same only one has my friends writing their blogs in it too... so which entries do I decide to enter into which things? Well I don't know... And some of my blogs are really long so might make other bloggers feel insignificant (hehehehe... you feel little :P) oh well...
MATHS! We all hate it (Everyone single one of us... even mathematicians... they are full of self-loathing and hatred for all mankind for thier opressive occupation makes them so) and quite frankly, being the weird person I am, I've decided that because the four maths lessons I have a week (well not anymore, school is over!) are very boring I need to make them a lot more interesting by doing strange things... like asking the teacher strange things, writing/ strange things on my tests and generally being odd. My maths teacher has often commented on how the class with me in it was the most interesting and "special" classes she's ever had... (And I choose to take her carefully picked euphemisms as compliments!)
Well last week my friend was just sitting there... not doing work as always and I go "Hey... let's see which one of us can hug the teacher (having her willingly hug us back) first before exams" and I bet him a dollar (because you see... I've had some bad troubles with betting more money and losing it... curse you attractive french foreign exchange students! I don't speak the language of your mind or your soul! Hence I now dislike camels...) and he eventually gives in after I bugged him for about a few minutes and it was on! See who can hug the teacher within the week we had left of school. My tactic: Flirting....
.... Yeah... I flirted with a middle-aged maths teacher (She is a girl by the way.... and has a very slim figure... Like a bulemic) for the entire lesson... I kept mentioning how good she was at teaching and smart she was for answering problems and even asked her how her day was ect... OK it was kinda toned down flirting (Yeah those out there who have been blessed by my flirtatious ways know that this is in fact not very flirty for me... but I mean... she's old and my teacher there are some things you don't say to your teacher... no matter what measely amount of money you might be getting for throwing away whatever scrap of dignity you've been trying so hard to achieve... yeah I think it's toned down but my friend next to me goes "are you trying to hug her or sleep with her?" which is so funny and you're an idiot and I hate you...) but at the very end of the day we're all out of our seats and near the whiteboard and the teacher says "goodbye, have a nice weekend" and I pat her on the shoulder and go "You too" and then hold out my arms awaiting a hug......
..... and wait....
.... Get a strange look.... she shakes her head and goes "Uh... no thanks. I'm not allowed"
I GOT REJECTED BY MY MATHS TEACHER!!!??? I got rejected... BY MY MATHS TEACHER!
... No one rejects my hugs! People ask for my hugs! Why!? Why!? Grr... oh well, I got laughed at by my friend who found it absolutely hilarious I was rejected and I said "Yeah but it was to see which one of us could do it first. Therefore you don't get the money and I don't lose it...." and we walked off.
One Week Later... (Today...)
We had been playing games all lesson. OK there's a game where there's a single line and underneath there's two lines then underneath four then 6 as so:
Anyhoo, I'm not sure what I should do now... because I have two blogs... both of which are pretty much the same only one has my friends writing their blogs in it too... so which entries do I decide to enter into which things? Well I don't know... And some of my blogs are really long so might make other bloggers feel insignificant (hehehehe... you feel little :P) oh well...
MATHS! We all hate it (Everyone single one of us... even mathematicians... they are full of self-loathing and hatred for all mankind for thier opressive occupation makes them so) and quite frankly, being the weird person I am, I've decided that because the four maths lessons I have a week (well not anymore, school is over!) are very boring I need to make them a lot more interesting by doing strange things... like asking the teacher strange things, writing/ strange things on my tests and generally being odd. My maths teacher has often commented on how the class with me in it was the most interesting and "special" classes she's ever had... (And I choose to take her carefully picked euphemisms as compliments!)
Well last week my friend was just sitting there... not doing work as always and I go "Hey... let's see which one of us can hug the teacher (having her willingly hug us back) first before exams" and I bet him a dollar (because you see... I've had some bad troubles with betting more money and losing it... curse you attractive french foreign exchange students! I don't speak the language of your mind or your soul! Hence I now dislike camels...) and he eventually gives in after I bugged him for about a few minutes and it was on! See who can hug the teacher within the week we had left of school. My tactic: Flirting....
.... Yeah... I flirted with a middle-aged maths teacher (She is a girl by the way.... and has a very slim figure... Like a bulemic) for the entire lesson... I kept mentioning how good she was at teaching and smart she was for answering problems and even asked her how her day was ect... OK it was kinda toned down flirting (Yeah those out there who have been blessed by my flirtatious ways know that this is in fact not very flirty for me... but I mean... she's old and my teacher there are some things you don't say to your teacher... no matter what measely amount of money you might be getting for throwing away whatever scrap of dignity you've been trying so hard to achieve... yeah I think it's toned down but my friend next to me goes "are you trying to hug her or sleep with her?" which is so funny and you're an idiot and I hate you...) but at the very end of the day we're all out of our seats and near the whiteboard and the teacher says "goodbye, have a nice weekend" and I pat her on the shoulder and go "You too" and then hold out my arms awaiting a hug......
..... and wait....
.... Get a strange look.... she shakes her head and goes "Uh... no thanks. I'm not allowed"
I GOT REJECTED BY MY MATHS TEACHER!!!??? I got rejected... BY MY MATHS TEACHER!
... No one rejects my hugs! People ask for my hugs! Why!? Why!? Grr... oh well, I got laughed at by my friend who found it absolutely hilarious I was rejected and I said "Yeah but it was to see which one of us could do it first. Therefore you don't get the money and I don't lose it...." and we walked off.
One Week Later... (Today...)
We had been playing games all lesson. OK there's a game where there's a single line and underneath there's two lines then underneath four then 6 as so:
OK I sure hope that comes out the way I want it to... well you see the aim of the game is to make your opponent to cross out the last line. Now you can cross out as many as you wont but you cant go over ones that are already crossed out and you can only cross out lines in the same row (straight lines, no diagonal or wavy ones that transcend rows) and basically my Physics teacher had been playing this with the entire class for half the lesson and no one beat him and during lunch I asked him what the strategy was and I all of a sudden learnt more methods of winning than just getting it so once cross X amount of lines out there are only 3 individual lines left (therefore your opponent crosses out one, you cross out one, your opponent crosses out the last and loses) and basically the winning formula is try to make it so you have either 2 lots of 2 by themselves at the end of your turn (Nothing they can do can stop you from winning then if you know what to do. They cross out 2 you cross out one there's one left they lose. They cross out one you cross out 2 same tihng) or, have 2 lots of 1 and 2 lots of 2 by themselves... you see reverse what I just said and you'll find that they go into each other and you ultimately can discover who will win after just a few turns...
Well after about 40 games of that on the board and winning 21 of them against 3 different people (Screw you! F:15 Me: 21 T: 5 J: 0... hahaha!) and playing celebrities heads (OK after a while I discovered I was American, dead, and a politician... OK that helps me just so much! And my friend kept saying "John Welkins" or something similar and so I guess that and it's wrong... turns out after determining I wasn't George Washington or Teddy Roosevelt or JFK ect ect - seeing how there are 44 presidents, most of which are dead I'm kinda screwed- that "John Welkins" was a clue to where the person died... guessed yet? I didn't... I had to be told at the end of the lesson Grampa Simpson was named after me... Abraham Lincoln!) it was the end of the lesson and so the teacher says goodbye to us all and that we've been a wonderful class to teach and it's been fun ect and I go "Thankyou. You are a wonderful teacher" and hold out my arms and she shrugs and hugs me....
... and instantly my voice goes 2 octaves higher. "YEAH! HAHAHA! Did you see that!?" I turn to see that neither of my friends who were aware of the challenge had seen me hug the teacher and they go what? "I HUGGED THE TEACHER!" (OK I realised now that my entire class heard me say that.... ok that's... embarrassing... eh... won't have to see them until next year most likely unless I see them at exams) and I'm like "where's my dollar!?" and my friend doesn't want to pay up so he literally bolts out of the door and I chase after him and I eventually corner him near the english block on the other side of the school and I'm telling someone about the challenge I had with him (I'm running, friend goes into a door and other guy just holds out his hand and grabs my shirt and I stop... how that works I don't know considering I'm twice his size... or maybe more... seriously that guy is so skinny!) and my friend keeps looking out the door and sees I'm still there standing and waiting and he eventually gives in and reaches into his wallet and gives me his dollar...
... :) I earnt that dollar... through methods bordering on prostitution.... :) I broke the law by hugging my teacher (Help! The teachers are sexually harrassing me.... willingly...) and I am proud of myself now :P
... I can finally sleep now....
OK now that dollar is worth so very little because of the recession but oh well! I earnt it!
Thursday, November 13, 2008
Lo and Behold: The Thing That Should Not Be
horay for my first blog entry ever.
i would just like to add that i am appointing myself as the official cinic, psychopath, sexaholic, mass murderer and all-round weird freak of this blog. so anyone who had their eyes on any of those possitions: HA! i beat u to it.
i was sitting in intro calc today having a conversation with myself and i had a very strange thought. as i was thinking this strange thought i had an even stranger one. and then i thought: am i actually thinking this in words??? it is a question i have spent a great ammount of time puzzling over. when we think of something, do we think that particular thought as words, like the ones i am writing down this second, or are they kinda like images that we throw together and make a slide-show of thought from??? do our thoughts come to us pre-assembled, or in bits and pieces like its been brought from ikea??? when we are having a casual conversation to someone, do we actually make a conscious effort to try and formulate what we want to say into words in our head (like the ones i am writing down right this instant), or does it just sort of pass out our mouths without a backwards glance at our brain??? i tried to decifer this puzzle, but of course as soon as i started trying to think clearly about what i was thinking, i actually started thinking in words subconsciously on purpose! i tried to stop, but once i started i couldnt. it was actually rather scary. after a while i think i started thinking my old way again, but of course as soon as i realised that it went right out the window once again before i had time to think of wether i was thinking in words or not. i asked several people wether they thought in words or not, and after they stopped to think about wether they think in words or not, they answered "yes", but i suspect that what happened to me had happened to them as well. as soon as you try and think about thinking something, it completely throws out your patterns and habbits of thought. so as they stopped and thought over my question, their brains decided to take this as a chance to mess with them and purposefully deliver their thoughts in words. after realising this anomaly, i realised what a fantastic device the human brain is. it can completely alter its own way of thinking and processing withought you even realising it. dam that human brain of mine, i must target the brains first if humanity is to fall to my feet..... anyway, afterwards i began to think that maybe this was again my brain messing with me, and i just wrote a whole fucking massive blog about nothing. oh well, its been fun, and for my first blog ever, im pretty proud. thanks for reading, unless your like me and you only skip to the interesting parts of blogs. well i got news for you, dickwad: there will be no interesting things in my blogs ever, just to spite you! mwuhahaha! oh how evil i am. dammit, that sounds kind of interesting..... i fail.
i would just like to add that i am appointing myself as the official cinic, psychopath, sexaholic, mass murderer and all-round weird freak of this blog. so anyone who had their eyes on any of those possitions: HA! i beat u to it.
i was sitting in intro calc today having a conversation with myself and i had a very strange thought. as i was thinking this strange thought i had an even stranger one. and then i thought: am i actually thinking this in words??? it is a question i have spent a great ammount of time puzzling over. when we think of something, do we think that particular thought as words, like the ones i am writing down this second, or are they kinda like images that we throw together and make a slide-show of thought from??? do our thoughts come to us pre-assembled, or in bits and pieces like its been brought from ikea??? when we are having a casual conversation to someone, do we actually make a conscious effort to try and formulate what we want to say into words in our head (like the ones i am writing down right this instant), or does it just sort of pass out our mouths without a backwards glance at our brain??? i tried to decifer this puzzle, but of course as soon as i started trying to think clearly about what i was thinking, i actually started thinking in words subconsciously on purpose! i tried to stop, but once i started i couldnt. it was actually rather scary. after a while i think i started thinking my old way again, but of course as soon as i realised that it went right out the window once again before i had time to think of wether i was thinking in words or not. i asked several people wether they thought in words or not, and after they stopped to think about wether they think in words or not, they answered "yes", but i suspect that what happened to me had happened to them as well. as soon as you try and think about thinking something, it completely throws out your patterns and habbits of thought. so as they stopped and thought over my question, their brains decided to take this as a chance to mess with them and purposefully deliver their thoughts in words. after realising this anomaly, i realised what a fantastic device the human brain is. it can completely alter its own way of thinking and processing withought you even realising it. dam that human brain of mine, i must target the brains first if humanity is to fall to my feet..... anyway, afterwards i began to think that maybe this was again my brain messing with me, and i just wrote a whole fucking massive blog about nothing. oh well, its been fun, and for my first blog ever, im pretty proud. thanks for reading, unless your like me and you only skip to the interesting parts of blogs. well i got news for you, dickwad: there will be no interesting things in my blogs ever, just to spite you! mwuhahaha! oh how evil i am. dammit, that sounds kind of interesting..... i fail.
Wednesday, November 12, 2008
From the Socialist....
Hey lucky people, check it out! Using a computer successfully! This is quite amazing.....
I feel like I’m obligated to write stuff, and I want to write stuff but I already had a big rant on my/not my blog and I’m tired and I need to study and I have a lovely but very annoying friend on the phone telling me all the different ways in which I can improve my life. Most involving strange things in faraway places with weird people I haven’t met, or at least don’t know well, and I just realised how weird that sounded for people with a dirty mind.......but you don’t have a dirty mind, right? You have no idea how my simple words could be misunderstood, yes? Good innocent and ignorant reader.....If not, you disgusting pervert! People hate you and when you die will dance on your grave. Ok, slight over exaggeration, I’m sure you’re not that bad.......
However people with dirty, creepy and just plain psycho minds are far more fun to be around. I’m crazy and disturbed. And pretty evil. For example, while cleaning out my wardrobe I found an old t-shirt of my brother’s that said:
HITLER: THE EUROPEAN TOUR
1938-1945
This refers to a man who was largely responsible for the deaths of roughly 11 million people and I laughed almost all afternoon. See what a horrible person I am? Unless you laughed too, then I don’t feel so bad. This is also on top of the fact that I am largely paranoid. Recently I have convinced myself that limos are evil and my lovely L on the other end of the phone has just asked me how I intend to get to ball next year if I refuse to ride in the most terrible of vehicles. Valid point but that’s a long time away and unless anyone I know dies soon I won’t have to worry about travelling in evil on four wheels.
I promise all this has a point- and that point is........
Bilby and cornflakes do you seriously want me blogging with you? I’m far too cynical and my mind is too twisted. Next thing you know I will be complaining about how corrupt the American political system is (how can they call themselves a democracy, they’re all completely corrupt! Capitalism is evil and there is a secret fundamentalist Christian society that tries to manipulate and control the world) and start with the communist propaganda (ok, I’m not hard-core red but you have to understand why people believe it’s a valid system of government- it offers a solution to exploitation and a chance at freedom and equality. I just think maybe people took Marx’s philosophical arguments a little too literally and went about revolution the wrong way. Revisionism is your friend, unless you live in a society corrupt with capitalism- the ultimate form of exploitation and alienation). For someone who had no idea what to say, I seem to be unable to shut up........... plus guys, ASIO probably is spying on us and working in conjunction with the CIA or FBI (both corrupt), and I’ve just got us all black-listed for my little communism-rules-and-American-government-sucks rant so to ensure your own personal safety it may be better to ban me from the blog and pretend you don’t know me for awhile. But I know you won’t do that because you both love me too much, right? Guys? Ummmm......... am I right in saying you love me? I’m right in saying you love me, yes? Guys?
I feel like I’m obligated to write stuff, and I want to write stuff but I already had a big rant on my/not my blog and I’m tired and I need to study and I have a lovely but very annoying friend on the phone telling me all the different ways in which I can improve my life. Most involving strange things in faraway places with weird people I haven’t met, or at least don’t know well, and I just realised how weird that sounded for people with a dirty mind.......but you don’t have a dirty mind, right? You have no idea how my simple words could be misunderstood, yes? Good innocent and ignorant reader.....If not, you disgusting pervert! People hate you and when you die will dance on your grave. Ok, slight over exaggeration, I’m sure you’re not that bad.......
However people with dirty, creepy and just plain psycho minds are far more fun to be around. I’m crazy and disturbed. And pretty evil. For example, while cleaning out my wardrobe I found an old t-shirt of my brother’s that said:
HITLER: THE EUROPEAN TOUR
1938-1945
This refers to a man who was largely responsible for the deaths of roughly 11 million people and I laughed almost all afternoon. See what a horrible person I am? Unless you laughed too, then I don’t feel so bad. This is also on top of the fact that I am largely paranoid. Recently I have convinced myself that limos are evil and my lovely L on the other end of the phone has just asked me how I intend to get to ball next year if I refuse to ride in the most terrible of vehicles. Valid point but that’s a long time away and unless anyone I know dies soon I won’t have to worry about travelling in evil on four wheels.
I promise all this has a point- and that point is........
Bilby and cornflakes do you seriously want me blogging with you? I’m far too cynical and my mind is too twisted. Next thing you know I will be complaining about how corrupt the American political system is (how can they call themselves a democracy, they’re all completely corrupt! Capitalism is evil and there is a secret fundamentalist Christian society that tries to manipulate and control the world) and start with the communist propaganda (ok, I’m not hard-core red but you have to understand why people believe it’s a valid system of government- it offers a solution to exploitation and a chance at freedom and equality. I just think maybe people took Marx’s philosophical arguments a little too literally and went about revolution the wrong way. Revisionism is your friend, unless you live in a society corrupt with capitalism- the ultimate form of exploitation and alienation). For someone who had no idea what to say, I seem to be unable to shut up........... plus guys, ASIO probably is spying on us and working in conjunction with the CIA or FBI (both corrupt), and I’ve just got us all black-listed for my little communism-rules-and-American-government-sucks rant so to ensure your own personal safety it may be better to ban me from the blog and pretend you don’t know me for awhile. But I know you won’t do that because you both love me too much, right? Guys? Ummmm......... am I right in saying you love me? I’m right in saying you love me, yes? Guys?
Friday, November 7, 2008
The Meaning of "Cornflake"
No, this is not a blog designed to endorse breakfast cereals... like all my blogs (all... two.... of them) there is a certain meaning behind the name of the title (url). I wanted to call this blog "TheWindow" but that was taken. It would've been like TheWindowOfBilby only for everyone... The Window to the world and all it's insanity... cool :) But no, failing that I tried to think of something that would mean something, something that seperates this random blog from every other random blog...
... cornflakes...
Well the second author of this blog (woo! Yeah! Authors!) has adopted to be called "Cornflake" and last I checked this was her thingy on her phone.... well it means something ok? Well we were giving these orals (hehehe immature giggle) NO not that! Oral presentations... as in we stand up and talk... about poetry really (It's an english lit thing... you wouldn't understand) and my friend stands up and gives a talk about her interpretation of one of the most simplest seeming and odd poems in all of Bruce Dawes Sometimes Gladness... "The Cornflake". What appeared to be a poem about... food... seemed to hold a deeper meaning for this girl and she explained it in a way that made absolute perfect sense (which considering she flailed her hands a lot when saying it made it all that more interesting and special) and the poem basically talks about Cornflakes being eaten with no thought, they just come and go but some stick and become stains and aren't washed off and survive generations... and well it's poetry so it can be interpreted different ways and isn't always as shallow as it seems she told us all that she thought it could be used to talk about humans. Many people are just made and they come and go, we're seemingly the same and pass by with no thought and nothing distinguishes us... but some of us... some of us very special little cornflakes break free of this cycle! We fling ourselves out of the bowl and we become famous or special or different or amasing or wonderful and we're out there to be remembered for many generations! Never to be washed off the floor or wall to which we cling! We are the cornflakes and we will not be moved! For a hundred years we will stand as an icon, a monument before the world and our name will be remembered...
So, being the awesome friend I am who cares, listens and likes in-jokes I decided that I shall make this blogs title based on that concept... that idea that we don't always have to be the same and some of us can stand out. Some of us can achieve more and so...
...We are cornflakes :)
... And these are the ramblings of these cornflakes...
Enjoy :)
... cornflakes...
Well the second author of this blog (woo! Yeah! Authors!) has adopted to be called "Cornflake" and last I checked this was her thingy on her phone.... well it means something ok? Well we were giving these orals (hehehe immature giggle) NO not that! Oral presentations... as in we stand up and talk... about poetry really (It's an english lit thing... you wouldn't understand) and my friend stands up and gives a talk about her interpretation of one of the most simplest seeming and odd poems in all of Bruce Dawes Sometimes Gladness... "The Cornflake". What appeared to be a poem about... food... seemed to hold a deeper meaning for this girl and she explained it in a way that made absolute perfect sense (which considering she flailed her hands a lot when saying it made it all that more interesting and special) and the poem basically talks about Cornflakes being eaten with no thought, they just come and go but some stick and become stains and aren't washed off and survive generations... and well it's poetry so it can be interpreted different ways and isn't always as shallow as it seems she told us all that she thought it could be used to talk about humans. Many people are just made and they come and go, we're seemingly the same and pass by with no thought and nothing distinguishes us... but some of us... some of us very special little cornflakes break free of this cycle! We fling ourselves out of the bowl and we become famous or special or different or amasing or wonderful and we're out there to be remembered for many generations! Never to be washed off the floor or wall to which we cling! We are the cornflakes and we will not be moved! For a hundred years we will stand as an icon, a monument before the world and our name will be remembered...
So, being the awesome friend I am who cares, listens and likes in-jokes I decided that I shall make this blogs title based on that concept... that idea that we don't always have to be the same and some of us can stand out. Some of us can achieve more and so...
...We are cornflakes :)
... And these are the ramblings of these cornflakes...
Enjoy :)
Fellow Cornflakes
OK this blog has been created well... for fun really. (I dare someone to come up with a perfectly legitimate and plausible reason why any of us do anything that isn't somehow related to our own enjoyment...) But how is this fun? Well you see this gets a bunch of people together to basically make the world just that little itty bitty tinsy tiny eeny weeny beeny seeny geeny teeny yeeny bit more interesting.... or just a bit more random :) OK the idea is get a few or more authors to this blog and just let them blog... a lot... about nothing, or something, or whatever. Trust me, blogging is fun! It really is you get a lot of things out and you come up with some really random things. So if you're currently reading this because I've sent you to this page and asked you to become a co-author to this blog I basically think you are quite dandy and awesome to say the least :) I also think you may be a bit odd... or very odd... doesn't matter! I like you anyway, and I hope you like me back.... the... way you like friends that is.... I'm pretty sure I'll try to invite some guys into this whole group blogging thing so I'd rather they not start making googly eyes at me... that's creepy...
Anyhoo, if you are an author of this blog please read the following rules (also, signing up to be an Author means I OWN YOUR SOUL!)
1. Don't blog about really personal matters.... OK strangely enough the world doesn't need to know that you're feeling really sad because sometimes you just feel so alone... (That's for the stalkers on myspace to find out) Feel free to tell us that someone in your life has died... we bloggers aren't completely heartless (only mindless zombies sent to read BLOGS) personal problems are for diaries not blogs.... unless they're really funny personal problems... I care though... (Of course, blogging about how you fed the dog today is really really strange and so therefore most likely encouraged :P Yes the world wants to hear about how fat your siblings or pets are becoming!)
2. Don't give away personal information... (like... no duh...) basically the world might care where you live.... but you really shouldn't let them know because some of the world is a creepy world. It clings to the underside of rocks and hisses in the dark trying to find out where you lives....
Also, you don't need to but it'd be really awesome if we all had an alias... I have an alias, Cornflake has an alias (of... "Cornflake"...) so feel free to hide who you are from the world! Woo! Hiding in an ironic fashion! :P
3. Don't post blogs consisted of single
BLOG
ENTRIES
WRITTEN
LIKE
THIS
Each page shows 20 (now 20! I've discovered how to change that number!) blog entries so if you post really short blogs that run off from each other YOU ANNOY EVERYONE!
4. Enjoy yourself...
... or else....
.....mwahahahahahahahahagajaggiebvasp0ghgljvushgilovechicken!hahahaha..... ha
Now, go out and blog, who cares what it's about? Just blog about how you don't know what to blog about... it will just spawn from there and it will be fun! And random and basically lets try to make the world laugh at our total awesome randomness... because we all know we're totally awesome... we're cornflakes :)
Anyhoo, if you are an author of this blog please read the following rules (also, signing up to be an Author means I OWN YOUR SOUL!)
1. Don't blog about really personal matters.... OK strangely enough the world doesn't need to know that you're feeling really sad because sometimes you just feel so alone... (That's for the stalkers on myspace to find out) Feel free to tell us that someone in your life has died... we bloggers aren't completely heartless (only mindless zombies sent to read BLOGS) personal problems are for diaries not blogs.... unless they're really funny personal problems... I care though... (Of course, blogging about how you fed the dog today is really really strange and so therefore most likely encouraged :P Yes the world wants to hear about how fat your siblings or pets are becoming!)
2. Don't give away personal information... (like... no duh...) basically the world might care where you live.... but you really shouldn't let them know because some of the world is a creepy world. It clings to the underside of rocks and hisses in the dark trying to find out where you lives....
Also, you don't need to but it'd be really awesome if we all had an alias... I have an alias, Cornflake has an alias (of... "Cornflake"...) so feel free to hide who you are from the world! Woo! Hiding in an ironic fashion! :P
3. Don't post blogs consisted of single
BLOG
ENTRIES
WRITTEN
LIKE
THIS
Each page shows 20 (now 20! I've discovered how to change that number!) blog entries so if you post really short blogs that run off from each other YOU ANNOY EVERYONE!
4. Enjoy yourself...
... or else....
.....mwahahahahahahahahagajaggiebvasp0ghgljvushgilovechicken!hahahaha..... ha
Now, go out and blog, who cares what it's about? Just blog about how you don't know what to blog about... it will just spawn from there and it will be fun! And random and basically lets try to make the world laugh at our total awesome randomness... because we all know we're totally awesome... we're cornflakes :)
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