A blog about Moe

I was instructed by Bilby to "blog moe!" and here I am, blogging moe! I did have an issue at first... I keep forgetting things lately and then I couldn't remember how to do all this blogging whatsit and then this big flashy thing came up saying DON'T PRESS THE RED BUTTON! And so I pressed the red button and it started raining tacos and nachos outside and then a banana driving a giant lollipop shaped spaceship landed in the backyard....

Not really.

But I did fix the problem and I could go for a taco right now.

So... moe, moe, moe. What is moe?

Moe is a character in The Simpsons. That's what Moe is. That's really all I think about when I think about Moe. Grey hair. *laughs at certain person with a grey hair*. Don't you kinda feel sorry for Moe sometimes? He tries so hard... fails so often...

Anywho, other meanings of Moe. Well, I fondly refer to a "moustache" as a "moe". Which reminds me of this one time I was drinking a Mocha Chill. I was staring up at this giant Mocha Chill sign (I was in a canteen) and it occured to me.... Chill... chillax! So then my friend and I grabbed permanent markers and wrote all over the cartons. No longer was I drinking "Mocha Chill" but a "Mochacha Chillax!" Then I organised my friends chocolates in alphabetical order by flavour, including the wrappers of the ones we'd already eaten. Anywho, so then we were writing random things and drawing random things (like a muffin train with a skillet hat) and I was mixing up the words of "Mocha Chillax" and was saying random things like "Chacha with a moe!" so I drew 3 little men wearing various dresses (one also had a top hat) doing the chacha and then I gave them all different moustaches.

Yay for random Google searches. A "moe (slang)" according to Wikipedia is "a Japanese slang word originally referring to fetish or love for characters in video games or anime and manga." But just like every other great Wikipedia article, it need "additional citations for verification." According to Uncyclopedia, which is just as reliable as Wikipedia, if not moreso, says "Moë" is a "slang word referring to non-sexual feelings of love and caring evoked by certain metal musicians."

People should Google search things more often. Like these guys I know who are saying "I will quand you" and so I searched for it, and "quand" means "when" in French.

moe. is also a band name. I love random band names, although some things get out of hand when you have to tell people about this song called "Do It Again! You're Not Making Me Want To Touch You! by You, Me and Everyone We Know" or one of those really long titles from Fall Out Boy. Soon enough songs like "This Awesomely Awesome Song Is So Fantabulous You Just Want To Dance To It Even Though We're An Emo Band Who Aren't Really Emo Because That's What We Tell You And You Will Think Exactly What We Tell You To Because We Like To Wear Top Hats At 10am On Sunday Mornings On The Fourty-fourth Week Of The Year Whilst Eating A Tofu Burger And Riding A Llama That Likes To Knit Long Wooly Socks" will be appearing on the charts! And don't deny it, you know you'd love to hear a song that has that as a title.

Hmm... After reading through a vast number of pages of Google searches (oh yes, I just love researching my blog material :P) I found the Anime News Network, which states that "To be moe, a character can be eager or perky, not overly independent, and call forth a desire in the viewer to protect them and nurture them. The term is also used to describe any preciously cute item." I can see it now, boyfriends calling their girlfriends "moe". "Does my butt look big in this?" "Awww you're so moe."

Who knew one liiiitle typo would result in a blog such as this, full of adventure, colour, random ramblings and irrelevant facts! And tacos. Lots and lots of tacos.

Anywho, what else does moe mean? Well I guess the closest thing I can think of is "mo", as in "moment". Like, "Hang on for just a mo." So I suggest you stop reading this and go and live the mo... moment. Mo just doesn't work in a serious way here. But really, this is the last day of the year! In less than 12 hours (I failed the maths exam, don't expect me to count much more!) this year is GONE. Never to be returned to... Until I find a time machine. But still, go forth young stallion and have a wonderful last day of 2008.

And yes, I just called you an adult male horse that has not been castrated. xD

It seemed fitting....

Anywho, enjoy the last moments of this year, and have a wonderful new year!

Normally Weird Conversations :)

Yep. Read on. Btw emoticons didn't copy over so mine goes :P(L)(W) after Smartical and his goes :D:P after ShmooFace. Also: bonus cookie points to the faithful reader who can guess what my msn name is a reference to!

ShmooFace says:
dude whats with tha wilted rose?
Smartical Don't worry I trust u... just I don't trust u at all says:
its been in my msn name for about 2 years now.... ur a bit slow on asking that question
ShmooFace says:
i guess i am a big, big idiot! im sorry, my love, will you ever forgive me????
Smartical Don't worry I trust u... just I don't trust u at all says:
uhy.... as long as u take back that sentence about calling me ur love then sure
ShmooFace says:
sorry honey-bunny
ShmooFace says:
but i love u sooooooo much i just cant keep it bottled up anymore
Smartical Don't worry I trust u... just I don't trust u at all says:
well.... too bad im madly in love with my GIRL-friend
Smartical Don't worry I trust u... just I don't trust u at all says:
cause i like girls with girl bits
ShmooFace says:
uh-huh but you'd dump her for me right......
Smartical Don't worry I trust u... just I don't trust u at all says:
hell no
ShmooFace says:
as for the girl bits.....that can be arranged
Smartical Don't worry I trust u... just I don't trust u at all says:
sure ur chest is larger but her face is cuter
ShmooFace says:
tell me then, what is the point in living if I cannot have u?
Smartical Don't worry I trust u... just I don't trust u at all says:
to make TD's and play WoW?
ShmooFace says:
oh well, love can be forceful --- rather than mutual
Smartical Don't worry I trust u... just I don't trust u at all says:
not legally it cant
Smartical Don't worry I trust u... just I don't trust u at all says:
thats called stalking or, if ur really forceful: sexual harrassment
ShmooFace says:
i will not the law get in the way of my love !!!!!
Smartical Don't worry I trust u... just I don't trust u at all says:
wil u let a double barreled shotgun aimed at ur face get in the way? pls say it will...
ShmooFace says:
puh guns cant kill my love for u
Smartical Don't worry I trust u... just I don't trust u at all says:
yeah but they can probably kill U
Smartical Don't worry I trust u... just I don't trust u at all says:
to answer ur question the wilted rose is nice. and i want a wilting rose (only slightly different to the emoticon) on my tombstone
Smartical Don't worry I trust u... just I don't trust u at all says:
its been in my mind for aobut 3 years now so im not likely to change my mind before my death
ShmooFace says:
on your tombstone, which will be romantically situated next to mine so that, even in death, we will be together.
Smartical Don't worry I trust u... just I don't trust u at all says:
yeah no... ok pls stop talking
Smartical Don't worry I trust u... just I don't trust u at all says:
be warned: i might copy and past this converation if it gets too creepy
ShmooFace says:
no one will be surprised
Smartical Don't worry I trust u... just I don't trust u at all says:
yeah but itll be funny
ShmooFace says:
meh they have come to expect it of us now
ShmooFace says:
and they know that u and me will inevitably get together anyway...they will just assume u have cold feet
Smartical Don't worry I trust u... just I don't trust u at all says:
..right... no....
ShmooFace says:
u say that now, but one day the words u will utter will be "I Do"
ShmooFace says:
obviously to me of course
Smartical Don't worry I trust u... just I don't trust u at all says:
only not to u or any other man
ShmooFace says:
and thn we will honeymoon in the bahamas ---- excellent
ShmooFace says:
i can picture it now a small villa just u and me on the beach sipping pina'colada's while....nah, better keep this conversation 'G' rated
Smartical Don't worry I trust u... just I don't trust u at all says:
wtf!?
ShmooFace says:
precisly
Smartical Don't worry I trust u... just I don't trust u at all says:
it stopped being G rated after the first 3 sentences...
Smartical Don't worry I trust u... just I don't trust u at all says:
send me the TD
ShmooFace says:
k my love
Smartical Don't worry I trust u... just I don't trust u at all says:
y do u hurt me with such a disturbing display of affection!?
ShmooFace says:
because I LOVE U
Smartical Don't worry I trust u... just I don't trust u at all says:
I DONT LOVE U BACK!
Smartical Don't worry I trust u... just I don't trust u at all says:
*runs away screaming*
ShmooFace says:
ill just run after you
Smartical Don't worry I trust u... just I don't trust u at all says:
the hell u will ur too fat
ShmooFace says:
yer but thats how u like it......
ShmooFace has now been blocked.

Life is never dull :)

Goodbye to the very odd year :)

Talking to drunks at midnight only to tell them where you live and giving them directions....


...Waking up to realise the exact same thing you have known for the past half a year....


Having a literal conversation about a euphemism for no adequate reason only to prove it wrong.


Putting things in the microwave because it's convenient storage.


Making things worse just to prove you can make them worse.


Becoming nocturnal for the sake of talking to someone in another country you'll never meet.


Skipping during phys ed laughing all the way.


Getting strange looks in public and not caring.


Combining two things in the pantry to see if it will taste good (but it rarely ever does)

Learning how stupid it feels talking to yourself on camera in your room.

Refusing to go into a shop because you don't want to stand around in there not doing anything having people staring at you so you end up standing around at the entrance not doing anything and having even more people staring at you.

Being asked what "character" you're dressed as when you go to school in normal attire.

Laughing at books about old computers from the early 90's when ironically your friend's do the same to your computer from the early 00's.

Getting into sleeping habits that bypass the morning.

Being so used to staying up past midnight you look down at the clock and go "Oh... it was Christmas half an hour ago.... cool."

Knowing that if you're bored you can always call up any of your wonderful friends and watch the phone bill go up :)

Knowing that this year was full of so much wonderful things that it's hard to beat. But you bet next year is going to be even better! :) Woo! 2009 people!

cornflake's first blog - attempt six

the world lost a very special individual on tuesday morning, who shall be referred to as orange (the name will make sense to people who know the story). a patient member of canteen, orange had relapsed for the third time in two years when he finally succumbed to hodgkins lymphoma. he was at home with his family when he died. once he recovered, he was going to attend a cricket academy and play test cricket for australia. he was sixteen fucking years old. his hair was finally starting to grow back. he never let the hand that fate dealt him make him bitter. he was gentle, somewhat naive and forgetful on occassion and always had a smile on his face, unless his little sister was getting on his nerves. having you in a better place is no consolation when you should still be here. fucking cancer.

on the subject of truth, assassinations and false prophets.

wow good to see there have been heaps of posts since i was last on the internet. congrats guys, your all a really hard working bunch. but seriously, everyone except for bilby needs to post some more stuff. especially you, cornflake! and dont go on about how shit everything you could post iis about. talk about simon! or something else interesting. who knows maybe you could write a post or two about that lovely dad of yours :)

well its been an interesting week. i finally met lorna! (sorry if i mis-spelled that) she is completely different to what i was expecting. she is really small, wich i kinda knew from everyone else, but still..... she's tiny! she seems really quiet as well, but that might have been that everyone else was just overly loud. yea thats probably the answer. she has a scottish accent, but its not as strong as i imagined, but again i didnt actually hear her talk all that much, so for all i know she could sound worse than mr meekle........shudder.

looks wise, she's very pretty. in fact probably more pretty than i imagined as well. she also looks different than i imagined in my minds eye. but then no-one really told me what she looked like other than "she's really small, and really cute". well anyway she seems to be a very cool and nice person. well done mr bilby, you got a fine catch there.

i was watching this show on tv last night called the moment of truth. perhaps you've heard of it??? well it goes like this: these people are all hooked up to a polygraph machine and asked a few yes or no questions. they can be on any subject, and they get progressively more personal. well then they get the person in front of a live studio audience and they have to answer all the questions truthfully in front of their friends, family, and the american nation. they can win up to $500,000 if they answer all 21 questions truthfully. sounds like a bit of fun.

so there i was, reading on the massive couch at about 11:30, when everyone else had gone to bed, and this show comes on tv called the moment of truth. iv never seen it before, but im pretty sure iv heard something about how it works. its something to do with answering questions truthfully, right??? so anyway they got this guy up and asked him some questions. it started out allright, just a bit of fun. but then the questions started getting more and more personal. the guy used to have a gambling problem, so they started asking "do you still gamble? do you see yourself as a dissapointment to your dad? have you ever lost more than $10,000 in one night of gambling?" well the guys dad had enough of this, so he pressed the button. the person who is answering the questions has their family and friends up on stage with them on a big couch, and if theres a question they dont want to hear the answer to, then they press this button, and they go to another question. but: the button can only be pressed once. so the dad pressed it, and they stopped asking him about his gambling.

by now i was thinking, this is different to what i expected. the guy was visibly upset, with all this talk of his gambling past. so they changed the topic of his questions......to his sex life. now keep in mind his girlfriend is sitting on the couch with his family and best friend. again, it didnt start out too bad, but it got really bad. they ended up asking "could you see yourself having kids with your girlfriend? do you think you could ever be faithful to just one woman? have you ever been paid for sex?" i mean, i suppose the guy's partially to blame, they were his truthful answers, (no, no, and yes, in that order, if you want to know) but by the time he decided to quit and leave with his money, his girlfriend was nearly in tears, and his mother and father were visibly upset as well.

after that, they called in this woman. again, didnt start out too badly. "do you think women envy your beauty? would you be upset if your kids inherited your fathers red hair?" and others i cant remember. it was pretty late by then, or early, depending on how you look at it. but again it got worse. by the time the episode finished, she had been asked, "do you find it tough sometimes to stay faithful to your husband? have you ever fantasised about soemone else during sex with your husband? have you ever had sex with a married man?" and then, the half a million question: do you ever regret marrying your husband? her husband, by this time, looked like he was gonna kill himself or something. she was visibly upset as well. but she answered truthfully none the less. i know what the answer is, but your all gonna have to watch it next week, cause thats when they show it. i heard they got divorced after that.

every time someone answered a question truthfully, the audience would aplaud. and i sat there thinking: are they aplauding the person for being honest, or the fact that they did something like getting paid for sex or sleeping with a married man? i dont know really. then i got to thinking: why would that woman throw away her marriage like that for half a million dollars? does human greed really steep that low? the answer of course is yes. greed is everywhere, and almost everything is governed by it. god bless humanity, we fuck up everything.

moving on, speaking ov governing, i was reading a very interesting short story yesterday. its called the children of bable, and its one of clive barkers books of blood stories. in the story, this woman accidentally stumbles upon this place in the wilderness, and they hold her against her will because there is stuff there that she cant know about. she later discovers that the worlds most brilliant minds, in the form of these 5 old people, are living there, and given the task of deciding every major decision in the world, from who gets ellected, to the outcomes of wars, and even the expansion of things like a country's borders. the old people have been deciding world events for so long, they've become bored with it, and they play games to decide what happens in the world, like flipping a coin, rock paper scissors, and the favourite, frog racing! the woman is quite shocked to discover every majour decission in the world for the last 10 years has been decided by chance. so she and the old people escape, but theres a car crash and the old people die.

when the woman comes to, she's looking at all these computer screens, showing the rooms of every prime minister, president, king, and whatnot in the world, and because its been several days since they recieved any orders and decissions, they are going quite spastic. the man who runs the place sais that the people on the screens in front of her couldnt run a circus, let alone a country, and the woman, looking at them, decides there is not a face among them she would trust either. so she sits down with the one old person who didnt die in the car crash (because he didnt want to escape), and starts racing frogs with him, for the rest of her life.

it was a brilliant story, and one i probably could imagine happening in our world. why do you think there have already been several plots un-earthed to assassinate obama??? because he thinks for himself. and almost every other pollitical figure who has thought for themselves has been assassinated. martin luther king jr, jfk, lincoln, even john lennon. and thinking back on it, i dont really think i would trust any current world leader (short of obama) to make any important decision.

christmas is aproaching. horay. answer me this: is anyone honestly looking forward to it this year??? i am not, to be perfectly honest. why, do you ask??? because in my oppinion, christmas is the lonliest day of the year. you get all these presents, all this nice food, a day off from work... and you have to spend it with your family. i dont want to spend any more time with my family than i have to. i would much rather spend it with my friends. but christmas is the one day of the year were parents say no, this is a family day. and why? because their celebrating the birth of someone who never even existed. the one day of the year i want more than anything to be around my friends, and i cant because the whole world has been duped into believing and worshipping the supposed birth of a complete fucking lie! and why do i have to spend it with my family anyway??? what has family got to do with anything??? my only real family are my friends, and i only ever feel at home when im with them. but clearly family comes above happiness. as does everything in the world. happiness is only a by-product of some of the things that go on around us, and no-one really cares in the grand scale of things if people are happy, so long as they are of course.

happy fucking holidays, everyone!

snake bite

i got my snakebites today. they hurt like fuck. for anybody who doesnt know, snakebites are twin piercings on the bottom lip. i love them muchly though. the guy who did them was really cool, but he downplayed the pain a fair bit. he told me his didnt hurt at all.

he lied. he had the needle just touching my lip, and he was like, breathe in, it helps, and of course with all his "its not that bad", i just expected a little prick. wrong. the needle was litterally rammed through my lip, and i was "shiiiiiit man!" but i couldnt talk much cause i had a bit of metal in my mouth. then he said open wide, and i thought he was going to take the needle out. so he gets ANOTHER needle and rams it into the first one. "ow ow ow jesus christ". but now i had two bits of metal in my mouth, so it was even less co-herent than the time before.

anyway, then it came time for the other side. he warned me that the second side hurts a lot more than the other side, but by this time, my mentallity was saying "when the other side gets pierced, then the side thats fucking canning like a bitch will stop hurting, cause pain will be drawn to the other side. i was right.

so he gets it all set up, he said take a deep breathe, but i was just like, hurry up and stab me. so here we go three two one OH MY FUCKING GOD THAT REALLY FUCKING HURTS!!! my eyes probably looked like they were trying to leap out of my skull, so christine held my hand and she was like, squeeze me harder than i'm squeezing you, so i did, but i must have squeezed really hard cause after one second she was like, oww let go that hurts. and christines pretty strong, to. she can carry me on her back, for christs sake. anyway, then the other needle had to go into the other side. so i grabbed cornflakes hand. and i think i just about fucking broke her fingers when the needle went in. if your reading this, sorry babe.

as we were leaving, i was feeling really hungry, so we decided to get some food. but my lip was still really hurting, i mean like on fire burning my skin off hurting. so we went to target to get some panadol. i was all for swallowing the packet whole, but the others didnt think that was such a good idea. anyway i took two, and they hadnt kicked in after 15 minutes, so i was being very agitated and difficult. sorry guys, didnt mean to offend you if i did. well we went to macca's. and i tried to eat a burger. it was decidedly more difficult than i thought it would be. i kept feeling like the backs of my piercings were going to catch in my teeth, and they'd be ripped out. wich is a rather unpleasant feeling. and to start off with i couldnt even fit the burger in my mouth, cause it felt wierd to be opening my mouth so wide with two pieces of metal sticking through them. i still cant really smile or laugh properly. hopefully my kissing wont be affected by this :p

well i caught up with jethro, jacob and bilby later that day, and we did some filming for one of bilby's movies. i got to be a killer! it was cool. i stabbed cornflake in the chest with a knife. if any one of my friends ever becomes a director, i am going to cameo in every movie they make either as the killer/villain, or as a continuous side character who is completely unimportant to the story, but sais the most random lines, and hopefully has the goriest death. i would like that a lot.

has anybody seen donnie darko??? i watched it last night, and it was one of the weirdest, trippiest films iv ever seen. it was completely awsome! i wasnt really expecting much, cause the only thing i knew about it when i rented it out was that it was really good, and it had jake and maggie gyllenhall playing a brother and sister. man, just watching all the trippy, dis-jointed stuff kinda made me feel less in touch with reality. but good god was it bloody brilliant.

then i got to thinking: if anything like this happened to me, would i react in the same way??? would i do what everyone else does??? i honestly dont know. i'd probably think i somehow got stuck in a movie or something. i dunno. if i had uber cool powers, i'd probably try and take over the world. that would be fun. although i have to admit, i probably would have done what donnie did in most situations, particullarly at the end of the movie. dont get me wrong though, im not a paranoid schizzophrenic, just increadibly paranoid. the movie had a wicked sound track as well.

well im off to research the summoning of demons for a little project me and some friends are planning. till next time, cheerio.

I'M OLD! I'M SO OLD!

OK, we all know what happens when you reach 40. You slow down, you don't move around as much and you have to work harder to make sure you don't let yourself go.... you also start to look in the mirror and hunt down those evil grey hairs that will eventually plague you and the fact that one day you won't even have any hair to worry about is strangely not comforting...

Yeah that'd be great if that happened to me at 40! I know I'm going to get bald, fat and sit around all day... because I'm currently 2/3 of that already! It's just that when I'm older I want to be able to look in the mirror and look at my few grey hairs and go "well, I guess this had to come eventually..."

.... what I don't want is to look in the mirror when I'm 40 and go "Hey wow I didn't know I had any red hairs left!"

...What has this got to do with anything at all ever? Well you see 40 year olds do the mirror thing...

... 16 year olds don't. Or at least shouldn't!!!! BUT I DO! I DO!! I didn't before but after today I might as well start because quite simply...

I FOUND A GREY HAIR! I FOUND A GREY HAIR! I'm now old !!! I'm an old person because I have a grey hair... I'm not overreacting you're underracting! I know going on about this is bad for my blood pressure and my ancient heart might not take the stress and I'd sit down but I'm afraid it'll take me 20 minutes to get out of it again because of my arthritis but... grr! What? I don't even think this is the first grey hair I've found! Seriously someone tell me this happens to everyone not just me right? Because that would really suck if I were to be grey all over by the time I'm in my mid 20's...

TO WIKIPEDIA!

Wikipedia to the rescue...

"More than 40 percent of Americans have some gray hair by age 40, but white hairs can appear as early as childhood."

Well that doesn't matter I'm not even American! :P nah ok. I have also started to research redhair and so far it is fascinating! It has nothing to do with the completely random white hair that is protruding from the right so of my head looking incredibly obvious whenever I look in the mirror but it's fascinating anyway! I'm apparently more sensitive to sunlight than people of any other hair colour because redheads normally have paler skin and freckle. (I can't tan) That's fine with me! Sunlight bad, summer is abnormally bright...

I can't be bothered researching this too much. I hope my grey hair goes away and I don't get another one for a long time... if not. Then I will be renamed "Red 'n' White" and shall stalk the night reeking my vengeance on those who dare to mock those who be ginger!

I don't want to be grey! :( I can't ironically mock someone for red hair anymore! It used to be very fun when someone was disgreeing with me to just go "Shut up rangar..." and they just look at me like "...what? but... you're... what?" and I get my laugh and walk away. I want to still be able to do that!

Failing doing that, I can always do what freaky old people who are obsessed with their appearance (I'm not obsessed with my appearance... I'm practically the anti-narcisist) and dye my hair to hide those small grey hairs. Hey what do you people think? Do you think I should be blonde or dye my hair black? :P Me as a blonde... hahaha

To photoshop! OK here are some really quickly (and poorly) done photoshopped images of me as a blond and one of me with black hair. Wow... OK I prefer red hair...

THOSE sort of awkward conversations

OK first quick thing before we get down to the serious (-ly disturbing) part of this blog (Don't worry... you'll find it amusing) I'd just like to say: woo! 21st post! (Can people please clean out their unfinished drafts?) Which now means that any posts will be pushed back to "older posts" and so to visit them you have to click buttons! Sorry... I know, all that effort... anyhoo, also, a special thankyou to the co-authors of this blog :) You are all wonderful and thankyou for contributing to this blog.... without it I would just be blogging by myself... which I do... so... yeah... woo! We now have a reasonable amount of co-authors. All of which are purely awesome! I hope to have a few more in the future sometime... and they'll all need to visit the first post http://ramblingsofcornflakes.blogspot.com/2008/11/fellow-cornflakes.html or I shall surely find them and hurt them.......... badly... grr (rar)

OK! When reading books or watching a movie and a teenager is all of a sudden confronted by a conversation they can't avoid and didn't know was coming it is sometimes very amusing to me... especially those sorts of talks that happen around the teenage years when your parents notice that you are getting affectionate towards someone else... yes... hilarious! Insant comedy gold every time I see those sorts of things somewhere because I'm incredibly sadistic and love the awkwardness that those poor poor people experience... in fact, I was just reading Eclipse today and Charlie decides to discuss with Bella how serious she is with Edward.... hahahaha!
That's so funny!

... up until the point that it happens to you... yeah... yeah I asked my mother if a very special person could maybe come over during new years eve and this of course involves being with her for an entire night. This in my mother's books is VERY BAD AND WRONG! So very wrong... OK first comes the strange shocking realisation that... I'm only 16! (Really mum!? I didn't know...) So therefore I apparently don't have a brain.

But she says "don't worry I trust you.."

OK now this brainless teenager shouldn't be around other brainless teenagers of the opposite gender unnatended because this will obviously ultimately lead to all sorts of things.... yeah because absolutely no thought or planning or precautions are put into this sort of thing? Yes, I know you're going to be alone and all and (the classic line): "I trust you.... BUT you're probably not going to be thinking of the consequences when the time comes" of course not mum... the last thing I'd be thinking about when I'm finally doing that is your angry face... that kinda ruins the mood if I'm thinking about you beating me across the head... Oh yeah plus your upbringing of me by pouring all those gentlemanly ideas into my head obviously means nothing.... Parents. They think they've done a good a job up until the point that you're 16.... then they don't believe a single thing they've ever said has sunk in and that you're probably going to go do something innapropriate (Hey at my age it's not illegal... so you can't have that issue with it) but don't worry... "I trust you"

Hey how about this deal? I don't disobey you... and you never ever EVER have one of these talks with me EVER again? I'd like that idea...

The idea (that my mother seems to have) is to say "I trust you" as much as she can... then everything else she says basically means "I just don't trust you at all..." OK so just imagine me standing there trying to get around this subject as much as possible and I'm writhing in pain inside because my mother doesn't just make these things uncomfortable because they're naturally uncomfortable... but she somehow tries to make them worse.... OK a prime example is this particular talk involved her mentioning that because I'm 16 that I don't have self control (hell, if I'm not storming out as soon as you bring this topic up just so not to upset you even though I really really want to be anywhere but there listening to you then.... I think I have some self control) and then comes the line...

"I was 16 once too you know I know what it's like..."

AAAGGHHHH!!! AGH! AGH! AGH! AAAAAAGGHHHH!!!! *brain melts* I refuse to think that my mother was ever my age and ever would know what.... the sort of stuff she's trying to make me keep in check is like.... agh! agh! no! my mother has always been over 40! All the photos of her being younger are all photoshopped! My mother was never 16... no... no... no too bad mum that doesn't count as an excuse because you didn't exist until I was 5... because I have no memory of you earlier than that.

This wasn't the worst conversation.... one was about "chilvary" and "not taking advantage" and has the worst possible line a mother could ever tell her son...

"treat her like your sister"

Hey thanks mum! Hahaha yeah OK treat her like my sister.... sorry, are you trying to ruin every relationship I have? I don't want to treat anyone like my sister! AGH! If I treated her remotely like my sister we'd never hug... worst thing you could possibly have just before a date is that line.... my mother apparently doesn't like affection... at all... it's bad and evil. So are grandchildren... which she doesn't want ever even when I'm older... nope. All forms of affection or anything are banned and must be repressed with disturbing mental images....

But don't worry... I'm being cautious and all but it's only because...

"I trust you"

Like hell you do! Parents never trust their children and sometimes they bloody well have reasons behind that! Sometimes they don't! This is one of those times when they don't... I just wish they'd be so naieve like they are about other things ("No don't worry mum A Clockwork Orange has nothing violent or obscene in it.... can I watch it?" "Yeah ok") and that they didn't insist of having one of those kinds of conversations... and if so... just have it once. I heard you the first time! I'm trying to talk over you because I don't like hearing the same thing twice!

Have a nice day :) Because mine was ruined by my brain melting....

Howdy!

Erg. That makes me sound like a cowboy. Hmm... Hi? Nah, too plain. Hello? Sounds so uncertain! Sup? Hmm... Too 90's! or too gangsta... either way, not what I'm looking for. Saluton? meh. Too foreign. Hey? so... something I would normally say. Is there a single conversation I start that doesn't begin with "Hey"?... actually yes, yes there is. Only if I know the person well enough to say something out of the ordinary though. Anywho, back to the problem at hand. Hi what's your name and phone number? Perhaps that's a little too stalkerish, but is something a certain admin would say *cough*Bilby*cough*. Reading things as I write them! *raises eyebrow*.

Ah stuff it. I'll put on my cowboy hat and chaps, grab a lasso and, HOWDY! *throws lasso at inanimate object and ends up lassoing self*

Not new to blogging, but new to this little community here! You have now been invaded by SAM-HAM! *raises fist to air, as superhero cape flies dramatically behind her*. Everybody put your helmets on and duck for cover! Or if all else fails, just grab a duck! No ducks around? Well then... you're screwed. *puts on American accent* Nice to meet y'all. *quits the American accent and slaps self in face*.

Speaking of accents... That is one area in drama where I suffer. I can do some. By some, I mean British. When trying to be Samuel Beckett (man of genius!) who lived in France, born in Ireland, I had a British accent! And even worse, well you know how you listen to people with accents to know how to speak like they do? Well when we did a play at the start of the year, we had to be Italian... Guess where I got my Italian accent from...

Red Bull adverts.

I kid you not. That lady leaning out of the car to yell at her son as he flies away? Yeah, that's where I got my accent. I've remained top of my drama class though!

You know what I hate? When you love a song and you dance around to it (what?! Who said anything about dancing in your underwear? Of course I don't do that! *shifty eyes*) then you listen to the lyrics and you cry. Or you realise it's in another language and could indeed be a threat to all of humanity, just set to a funky beat. I do that all the time with a song by Cute Is What We Aim For. I sing along, then once again realise that it's an underage girl getting drunk and sleeping with a guy who then abandons her.

Did I say I have a superhero cape? Oh well there you go, I must feel comfortable here already seeing as I already lied to you all! Actually I made my friend a superhero cape for her 16th this year. It was made out of bright striped material, and because I blew up the sewing machine (oops!) I had to hand sew EVERY SINGLE stitch. Now this was like a life size cape! I even hand sewed the seams!! Spose that's better than hand sowing seams...
I'm going to make one for myself eventually though. It'll go perfectly with my sombreros and knee high socks.

So, why am I here? I was held against my will to a bed made of marshmallow and threatened to join, or else face an enternity of eating carrot soup with an invisible fork. Well, in reality I was talking to Bilby about New Years Resolutions. I don't think Resolutions has a capital letter but OH WELL. So yes I said one of mine was to start a new blog in a new place. He then coerced me, in a gentle and unthreatning way, to join here. It feels a little odd, as I wasn't going to start until New Years, seeing as the blog was about my new life! (Just got out of a horrible relationship. I know, I know, no personal issues to be discussed - but it is relevant!) But oh well! Better now than never! Or... better now than in 24 days!

Tally-ho, it's off to bed I go!
Actually, I lie again. And I don't mean lie in bed! Heh. Anywho, I must first finish writing other various emails and things, and then... other things. Then sleep!

Have a nice day!

(EDIT: Oh dear goodness. I just realised that how I finished my blog entry is rather VERY similar to how a certain someone else (yes YOU there) finished theirs. We are much too alike sometimes. But... but that's how I often finish my other blog entries in the other place I blog! Erg.)

Imitation

They say imitation is the greatest form of flattery.... they're bloody wrong. Who are "they" anyway and why do they say a lot of things? I don't know... I just don't know! (*breaks down into tears*) I actually do like the idea of imitation being the best form of flattery. I try to imitate things around me occasionally. I like comics... but especially ones that are well drawn (yeah... I judge books by their covers...) because I want to see if I can mimick their drawings... and so then later on I've figured out certain things in more detail and can draw them better... like superman or alien.



What that has to do with anything I have no idea! This post isn't about imitating drawings... in fact it's about imitating life. In my old drama class (which I guess I am no longer part of... holidays and all and when their over it's going to be a new drama class) one thing the teacher (who is AWESOME!) said was to watch people and pick up their movements and mannerisms so you can later mimick them. I was very disapointed that we never got to do an exercise where we imitated our classmates because I would've been quite good at that I say... some of the people in the class are quite distinct (especially cornflake. You're wonderfully unique :)) and it would've been lots and lots of fun mocking- I mean, mimicking their unique hand gestures and movements. (The face! The horse he makes that face! You know...)



So oh well, I never got to mimick those people around me... so today... I'm going to see how good I am at mimicking through writing...



That's right :D I'm going to mimick fellow bloggers! (poorly) See if you can guess which ones they are! (Btw, not all of these are part of ramblingsofcornflakes and outside bloggers that I know of might actually be included) OK: (Keep in mind that these are mainly done from memory and I really should've spent more time paying more attention to the specific words these people use... oh well enjoy my attempt at mimicking people!)



1)









Well that was a mean joke I'm sorry... that's such an easy one to get though... (We still care about you silent one!)



2) ok today i drank so much v it was awesome. i think i'm addicted to v. i hurt people who take it away from me. y is it that it never makes me hyper though? i really would like lots of energy when i destroy the world.



once again i am broke. i have completely run out of money because certain people keep on asking me stuff and i'm too kind to give in and buy so much stuff for everyone else. i swear my manager needs to start paying me more if i'm ever going to move out of home. i would love to have a house to myself just cover that walls in linkin park posters and metallica and in the basement i could have a carpet with a pentagram on it. or even better i could paint it into the floor! probably summon some demons... i would really like to ability to shoot fire from my hands. then i could burn cities to the ground and no one could stop me.



3) OK, this is an absolutely boring blog and sometimes I wonder why I even bother to contribute to my own blog. I've been tempted into doing this by C, who has decided that this is his codename recently somewhere in the first our of a very long conversation concerning God, life, death, human communication, mannerism, psychology and how he talks to his bunny rabbit. So many people want to know their code names and I haven't even thought of any but I'm pretty sure it'll just be a number or letter because I really don't care too much. No I'm sorry I should care about the single letter I refer to you as on the off chance I shall blog about you. Sorry people that I know... Please don't hurt me? I don't actually know what you people think or feel so I'm just going to continue talking about.... something....



This blog doesn't actually have anything in it. I normally do blog about something but today doesn't seem to have much to say. OK I'm going to break the 4th wall here and seriously mess with people's minds. I think it's going to be very weird when I read this blog. The me me not the imitation me. Imitation me doesn't actually think this is weird but real me will be reading this thinking that it's weird and now I'm probably going to be agreeing with what I'm saying here only if I don't then I'm not good at imitating myself which is beyond weird when you try to think about it. Now that didn't make much sense. Do I make sense? Well there have been a lot more embarrassing moments in my life which we're not going to mention. I've told you all far too much about me and I'm going to not tell you anymore.



4) Grr. another boring class that i'm stuck in so i can't type mcuh. i feel like hurting someone right now, the teacher is just soooo boring! he is meen too and never gives me extensins on my work!!

cheerio

talk to you later



5) OK sorry darlings for not blogging recently I've just been busy with work. But it's the holidays now so woohoo! No more maths (I'm not too good at it) which is going to be awesome! Holidays ftw! What shall I blog about? I don't know :( My blogs are pointless.

Twilight is coming out soon! It's so awesome I love Edward Cullen!!! He is so hot I adore him! :) I really want an Edward to myself :P I'm going to see the movie as soon as I can. I sure hope the movie lives up to the book.

Sorry people but I've run out of things to say! :( oh well.
any who. Leave comments and thanks for reading this kay :)
much love
xx

---

OK! Well I sure hope none of those people are offended by me mimicking them... I really couldn't think of much to say so these are quite short and do not reflect the normal length of their posts. OK seriously please tell me the people that are being parodied can at least realise who they are? I'm not sure how well I did so please tell me that you know who these people are! Most of these people are from this blog but some are from others... but others that visit this one quite frequently and come on... I'm pretty sure some of you who are part of this blog might know who the others are. Btw the opinions and beliefs expressed in the imitation blogs are not my own and are based on what the people they are mimicking have previously said.... I don't believe number 5's blog is pointless at all!

Well I've bored you people for long enough....

OH LOOK A BIRD!

The End of The World

Woo! Hell yeah it's the end of the world!.... No not really, sorry to get your hopes up all you rapture-junkies (You know who you are! hahaha you are so addicted to the end of the world... crazy gits.... no that joke made no sense) but this is merely a story about the end of the world... well, actually it's not even that... but it eventually gets to a bit of destruction which I'm sure you'll all enjoy! Well OK, the wonderful and lovely Brooke, (Has stolen my thoughts! Oh! Yeah that joke will never die! Even though... I've only actually ever said it once before... bonus cookie points to the people who can tell me when I've said that joke before...) the girl we all adore... in a friendly sense because some of us (OK only me) have a girlfriend. Well anyhoo, she has shown off some things she has written and they are, quite frankly, brilliant! I love them as I would love a child... enough to look at it for more than a few minutes and show some interest in it without actually doing anything to/for it! Yeah... I don't like kids too much... OK maybe I like Brooke's stories even more than children? Wait... that makes me sound heartless (Darkside! - bonus cookie points waiting people) but oh well!

Anyhoo.... my point is: I feel like showing off/competing with Brooke. Why? Because I'm... made of awesomevil... that's right I am awesomevil! (I don't even know how to pronounce that!) and I don't know. I have a lot of spare time now that it's holidays so I just keep wanting to blog but can't be bothered typing too much so yeah...

OK! Check out one of Brooke's wonderful stories :) This one is the happy one:

http://panicthisgiirl.blogspot.com/2008/11/jump.html

OK and this is my story! It's a bit longer but hey... be glad you're not reading it all... it's nearly 14 pages so far and I'm working on it! I has an idea! This is part of it!

Her name is Caitlin. (No bonus cookie points there unfortunately...) Let's just say she's 16 or 17. OK! Read on.... this is:

Untitled! (Wow.... imaginative...)

I was hungry so I decided to stop by at a fast food outlet before heading back home. I was barely paying any attention to my surroundings I didn’t even know what franchise I was inside and just ordered the first thing I saw on the list behind the woman at the counter. She handed me my food and I found a table in the corner far away from everyone else.
I don’t know how long I was there just staring at the blur of the headlights of cars as they went past but I snapped out of my trance when a cleaner came nearby and tried to mop near my feet.
I looked around and noticed that the entire place was empty except one or two people who had only come in recently. It was also very dark.
I sprang to my feet and got out of the way of the cleaner as I ran towards the door. I wasn’t meant to be home too late my father would get very angry. I started thinking of a way to sneak into the house without him knowing or how to get out of being punished as I stepped into the cold night air.
It was late and the stars were coming out. Clouds rolled over them and it become even darker and I kept walking. The only light being the occasional street lamp along the road near the foreshore and so I wasn’t completely blind. But it was somewhat uncomfortable being out alone this late even when I wasn’t going to be in trouble for it.
I saw in front of me four very large, very tough and very dangerous looking men. They were dressed in dark clothes and had some way of concealing their faces so I wouldn’t be able to recognize them if I saw them in the light. One was wearing sunglasses and another wore a hat. Well that seemed really stupid, it’s the night.
They looked at me and I could hear some excited murmurs as I got closer to them but I tried not to show how concerned I was about them. I tried only to look at them from the side of my eyes and to make it look like I had no interest or acknowledgement of their existence. I really didn’t want their attention but I unfortunately think I already had it.
I started to try and fade away in my head again. Preparing myself for what might come. I started to zone out and become disconnected from the world around me just enough that I would still be able to walk.
Suddenly something caught my attention and prevented me from separating mind from body. A fifth man -whose face was covered in cloth so I couldn’t see his mouth- joined them and walked side by side them. Oh great. There were even more of them now and this one didn’t look as large as them so he’d probably be able to chase after me if I ran.
The really strange thing about the fifth man was that the others didn’t seem to be too happy about him. This confused me when they started to walk slower to let him pass by them. The fifth man did the same. They then sped up and so did the fifth man. What was going on? Was this guy just drunk and seeing if he could annoy these people? The four men stopped entirely and faced the other man. They all looked very annoyed.
Fifth looked at them and pulled down the cloth that had covered his mouth. He smiled. His grin was stupid, eager and oblivious.
They looked back, angry, irritated and intent on smashing this guy’s face in now.
“What do you think you’re doing?” one of the larger men said.
Fifth still just stood there smiling. I had stopped to watch now. Even though this was probably a bad idea I was standing there with fascination at what was before me. Surely this man was insane or inebriated in some way or another because he was thin, my height and was up against four people twice his size that he didn’t seem to realize were a danger to him.
“Oi! We’re talking to you! Answer us!”
The largest of the guys stood in front of Fifth as the rest surrounded him. He didn’t even bother to look around at them; instead he turned his head slowly and looked at me. His head tilted to the side so he was looking at me on an angle. I saw it then, his eyes were discoloured, they were dark with specks of red and lines of white that were surrounded by a sea of pale yellow instead of white. He looked like he had a disease, he looked rapid and he looked incredibly insane now with his stupid toothed grin and ragged hair that hung below his shoulders. I could see him better now, easier, like he was slightly illuminated by the light around him more than anyone else. The world seemed to focus around him and his discoloured eyes store deep into mine. This strangely was a lot less unnerving than the fact that his line of sight had been met by the other four men and they were now looking at me too.
His head tilted and rotated back to face the big one. He tilted his head back and looked up at the man standing a whole head and shoulders above him then his head continued moving back. He was looking directly at the man behind him only his head was upside down… 180 degrees from what heads normally face.
“You are the little one,” he said to the man behind him.
It was obvious that he had annoyed them because they got somewhat restless and their patient waiting before they attacked seemed to be coming to an end.
“Right! Get him!”
It didn’t matter who said that because they were all struck at once. I don’t know how you strike in four different directions at once but somehow the ragged stranger seemed to manage. Before the broken, and now toothless, heads of the men had even made it halfway to the ground fifth had slammed his fist into the path and the ground opened up before him. He had created some sort of rift in the concrete path that spiraled down into darkness and the four men were sucked into it, bleeding and screaming at the sheer terror of the never ending fall into darkness before them.
Then it was all gone and they lay there screaming and writhing on the pavement as they clutched their broken teeth and battered jaws. They realized they were no longer falling and quickly scrambled away on all fours as they attempted to get up onto their hind legs.
“Running… like dogs…” the man who had done it all said with a strange hint of fascination in his voice.
He looked down and picked up the teeth one by one. He counted them as he did and it surprised me that the number had reached the double digits. Thirty-one teeth! What also surprised me was that I had stuck around long enough to watch this stranger pick up teeth from four men twice his size that he had just sent screaming and scared like a bunch of children from a rapid dog.
He poured the teeth into his pocket in his coat and turned around to face me. His clothes were bizarre to say the least. His black coat was covered in uneven and unsymmetrical pockets, some of which bulged. It had strips of cloth that hang from it forming stalactite-like shadows between his legs and arms and it was covered in strips of cloth that would come out of places, like his shoulder, and simply become reattached somewhere else, like his elbow. The sleeves covered the tops of his hands yet stopped at his wrists. Although this looked like the most unprofessional and incompetent design for a piece of clothing it seemed immaculately done, seamless as if someone had deliberately done something as bizarrely imperfect looking as this. His pants were similar, black and perfect in how they were built but unusual in design. He had a pocket on his knee on his right leg and a large, and uneven, pocket on the side of his left calf. There were two normal pockets on the sides of his hips like most pants where his hands were currently inside of. He wore large black leather boots that seemed to be the most normal thing he was wearing, if you call large black boots normal.
Somehow he didn’t look gothic even though he was dressed entirely in black. He just looked different to anything around him yet blended into the night. If it weren’t for his strange luminance in the near darkness of the night he’d be almost invisible.
Besides his clothes, his eyes, his deranged face of interest and amusement and his messy long black hair that would stick out slightly like it was almost spiked, he looked pretty normal. His body looked normal although it was almost completely covered in black so I guess maybe the rest of him was discoloured too. It would make sense; he’s probably very pale beneath that tangled mess of cloth and leather.
But those eyes… those strange yellow eyes that seemed to be looking into me rather than at me. They were scary and calming at the same time. I guess he had just saved my life just then, or at least saved me from something very terrible at the very least.
He bowed suddenly.
“You’re welcome.”
“Thank… you…”
Did he just read my mind? Can he hear my thoughts? Why hasn’t his strange and startling appearance combined with his purely bizarre and frightening demonstration of supernatural power left me scared?
He started walking towards me. I took a step back, not sure if I could outrun him or even if this guy needed to move to catch me or not but I guess stepping back slightly at the point in time would be expected from anyone. He didn’t notice, or at least didn’t act like he noticed, I wasn’t certain if he was unaware of the things around him or if he just acted like this. He might’ve been aware that those men probably weren’t going to do the nicest of things to me but maybe he just hurts people for fun.
He was standing only a small distance from me now. The kind of distance you have between a friend when talking to them. Not distant or invasive.
“What will you do with their teeth?” It was the first thing that came to mind. Asking unordinary people ordinary questions is not a bad idea but it’s not exactly a very helpful one.
He held out his hand and I took it after a long hesitation. He put my hand into a pocket. I nearly recoiled when I realized that it was the same pocket he had put the teeth in but I realized it there was nothing in there.
He smiled the same bare toothed smile and let go of my hand. He wasn’t going to do anything with the teeth; he had already gotten rid of them somehow.
There was a flutter of wings and a flash of black and I was standing outside my house and he was nowhere to be seen.
When I got inside my father was already asleep. I hoped that in the morning he had forgotten all about my late arrival and I would get off just this once.

That night I dreamt of waves crashing, mountains shaking and the world in upheaval. And amongst the turmoil, in the heart of destruction there was him. He stood there with the same oblivious smile but his eyes looked at the world before him and saw the stone and steel shatter into oblivion and I knew that then and there he was conscious of the end of the world. He was fully aware than as the ground itself split into two that he was amidst it all and he just smiled.
Then his hands rose into the air and he conducted the waves and lightning and earthquakes like a symphony. He was the conductor and composer of his own sonata and devastation was his instruments. Oh how he played the annihilation of the world so beautifully as the stars and planets joined in and the sky became a mural of a million trillion supernovas. Fire filled the sky and the sky was no longer the limits of my perception as I could see everything at once, direction or position meant nothing because I could see it all and I watched it burn. It was no longer the end of the world but of life, of the stars and nebulas and everything that in the universe.
He lowered his hands and all of creation was no more.
No more light. No more sound. No more warmth or cold or sensation or anything but unending darkness.
And in the darkness was his smile.

I awoke shocked. The dream was so real, so indescribable in how it felt and now it was all fading away like any dream does. Now waking it was incomprehensible how it could’ve been as vivid sleeping. By the time I had finished breakfast the only thing I could clearly remember that wasn’t merely an idea or vague memory, and a mere fraction of the intensity of the dream, was the smile. There was nothing but a smile in the darkness.

Why would anyone be happy about the end of the world?

Why indeed... yes... and it's spelt checked! With an American spell checker unfortunately... because my computer in my room unfortunately doesn't have any other versions of English like... the correct one... yeah I hate the Americanised-English...

Anyhoo, if you read this and don't tell me what you think... I shall find you... Also, don't compare my story to Brooke's. Completely different subject, purpose and is different to mine. Hers is a short story mine is a story extract... so no comparing... it's like comparing Terminator to Casablanca. (Do you really think my story is as good as Casablanca though?) So no one do that... because I personally can't handle the idea that Brooke is a better writer than me... my self esteem is so fragile! AAAAAGGGHHHHHH! Not criticism!

No I'm kidding... tell me honestly what you thought of my story extract :)

Have a nice day

lucky

hooray for the first post of december!

also, it is the 17th post on this blog, and as most people should know, 17 is my lucky number!

well, 17 and a half has more meaning to it, but 17 is still lucky for me.
anyway, i feel honoured. or agravated. im not sure wich...

anyway i was reading bella's blog earlier, and i read the one about her friends mum. it actually made me rather sad, wich is unusual cause i didnt actually feel too sad when my uncle died in a car crash... hmmm i have gotten my priorities waaaayyyy mixed up here.

anyway as i was reading it i suddenly thought, whats it like to die???
morbid i know, but hey, who hasnt wondered that at some point in time???

i personally think that dying would be an absolutely fascinating experience, although im not really ready to try it out right at this moment. give it a week or two. but seriously the whole death thing fascinates me. i should become the next grim reaper. that would be my dream job i think.

i suppose one of the main things that's got me so fascinated is that all our speculations about death and dying are just that: speculations! we have no real evidence that anything or nothing or something happens, and even if it did, we have no way of knowing what it would be. i mean, we cant send someone out like we did to the moon and expect to hear back from them in a week or two, thats just silly. and thats really the only way we could know what happens afterwards.

its kinda like the anomalie of black holes. no-one really knows what would happen if you could pass through one. well, we know you would certainly die without some sort of ship or suit that can withstand the gravity, but if you could survive your trip through, we have no clue whats beyond there. absolutely no idea.

ooooh, mysterious. i dont like mysteries. most mysteries i solve quite quickly, but then i stop and im like no, that cant be it cause im stupid and theres no way i could have figured out the whole plot this quickly, it must be something completely non-related. and then the mysterie is solved, and im like, i so knew that, but of course no-one believes me. kinda sad really. doesnt anyone trust me to be able to think of stuff on my own. on second thoughts, dont answer, i may not like what i hear...

a little off the topic, but yes, i couldnt really continue my morbid conversation without side tracking a bit. it helps me think of new things to say. but its not really working right now unfortunately.

blargh. i would love to sit down and have a long deep and meaningful with death. i think he'd be an interesting person/thing. i mean, he's been around pretty much since life started, so im sure he's got some interesting tales to tell. unless he turns out to be like death from family guy. in wich case i'd just laugh myself to death. no pun intended.

sigh. im not really in the right headspace to be going on like this on an important topic like this. i lost one of my best friends and i dont know if i can get her back. on the upside i've been left speachless by a certain friend during a certain text conversation this weekend. it involved showers, kissing, killing god, me being a personal body guard, and what people want most in life. wich reminds me: everyone comment this, i want to know what everyone wants. so that way, when i become a powerful imortal super-being, i can give everyone what they REALLY want for christmas.

well, im nearly done now. i suppose il finish up by saying the best and most interesting thing about death and its related subjects is that whatever anybody thinks and believes is instantly right! well, we have no proof of anything, but we dont have any dis-proof either, so in this one instance, everyones oppinion can be correct!

oh, and to friend i feel i have lost: if you are reading this, i dont regret anything i'v said except the part about you doing yourself in. i am sorry for that, and i still want to remain friends. if you dont want to though, then tell me so, so that i wont be left waiting for something thats not going to happen. i still value you as one of my best friends, even if you dont feel the same way.